Jaime went ahead as he scanned the floor. In his memory, the ceiling had been higher. With his height and build, it seemed far narrower. He also remembered the look on Father’s face. He’d regretted not going with them and staying to fight in a futile attempt to protect the rest of the family.
If those two men hadn’t come, Mother would have taken Jaime out through the fireplace.
He came to the ladder and carefully climbed it, realizing it wasn't so sturdy after all since he wasn’t a small child clambering up. Cobwebs lined the walls, and he tried to remember.
He was sure Mother’s hair had still been up when they used the ladder. It had been loose before entering the sitting room.
The sheath of his sword bumped the edge before he stood and held out the lantern. Amid the gloom and old dust caked on the floor despite the passage being closed, he caught a dull glint ahead. His heart thudded as he hurried over and picked it up. It was dirty, and he crouched to pull out his hanky and rub at the cold metal in his hands.
The diamonds were all still there in Mother’s rose clip.
It was the one she’d worn that night and many others. She’d let him look at it before, and he’d marveled at the rich details. Father had given it to her as a present when he was around four.
It had fallen out of her hair, and she hadn’t stopped to grab it. She might not have even noticed in her panic to save her son. If he went on, he’d come to the end and the sitting room. They hadn’t used it earlier, and he didn’t think he could bring himself to enter. Mother and his sibling had died on the floor, and Father had died in that room too.
He realized that if he lived there with Aleric and their child, or possibly children, he’d likely feel at home again. They get used to it, and the place would have their personal touch. He wasn’t sure if he could ever enter that room again. It was worse than the Hall where he knew both sets of Grandparents had perished along with cousins and close family friends that he didn’t remember so well anymore.
He took a deep breath and stood. He didn’t know what lay in the attic, but he had something special of Mother’s now. If they had a little girl, perhaps she’d like the clip one day.
***
Jaime helped Aleric up the narrow, circular staircase that led into the attic. He’d already gone through, and he was ready to show his husband. Foofy had gone off somewhere, which meant he was probably searching the lord’s larder for snacks.
“That’s you,” Aleric said almost immediately when they entered. Jaime had found and unwrapped a family portrait. He had no memory of it being done and guessed he was about three. He was seated between his parents. The work must have taken ages since most three-year-olds aren’t prone to sitting neatly and quietly for hours at a time.
Little Jaime didn’t exactly look pleased on the couch in his vest and coat.
“Your Mother was beautiful, and you take a lot after her,” said Aleric.
“Not Father, unfortunately, except for the eyes,” said Jaime. “A coincidence of color. I…”
“What?” Aleric slipped an arm around his back.
“I thought I was seeing him in my face as I grew up. When I came up here, I was hoping I’d see a resemblance, and find Gautier was lying. Father looks like how I remember, but not quite either. Gautier was right when he said my young mind had filled in the bits and thought we looked alike to a point. I don’t take after him at all. If I’d grown up here, I think people might have suspected I wasn’t his son.”
“He loved you like a son.”
“I know.” Mother wasn’t smiling since people often didn’t for portraits. It would grow tiresome. She still looked happy. “Honestly, I’m not sure why she didn’t get rid of me. I don’t see her parents as being the sort to force their daughter to keep a baby like that.”
“She chose you instead. Gautier sought to punish and try to ruin her. She didn’t let him. He thought he won in a way, and she turned it right back around on him.”
Maybe that partly accounted for the attack later. While Gautier had mostly been mad at Lord Scaliger for getting what Gautier thought should be his, he must have still been furious with Mother in the back of his mind.
She’d kept the child and had a good marriage with Father. How dare she have anything good? How dare she have another child with the man who’d stolen her because in his head, that’s all she was to him. A thing. Gautier thought to claim her like an item, and Lord Scaliger had taken her. The choices and wants of Meredith had never mattered to him.
He would have taken Jaime if possible, and he cringed to think of having been raised by that man. Maybe he would have grown into a person who thinks to take and claim and reacts with violence and anger when refused.
Deep down, Gautier had been insecure with an ego too easily shaken.
Jaime kissed the side of Aleric’s head. “Maybe we could put this one up at home?”
“You can put any up. It’s your family, and I know Father won’t mind. We’re joined now. Whatever you want.”
Jaime placed his hand on Aleric’s belly. The two main things he wanted in life were right next to him.
Epilogue
Aleric thought he’d been big at six months. At nine months, he felt ready to pop like a bubble. On the night he gave birth, he was too tired to care about his appearance. Nothing had quite prepared him for what contractions felt like, and Delphine had to remind him to breathe.
