“Fuckkkk,” I exploded, filling her with my pleasure as my hand continued to stroke between her legs while the other gripped her hips. I didn’t stop thrusting until we were both entirely spent.
“Merry Christmas to you too,” Shelby spoke, her post-orgasm voice still husky with sleep and I grinned into her hair, holding myself on my forearms, my semi-hard dick refusing to leave.
“I wish I could start every morning like this,” I answered, the closest either of us had come to discussing the impending goodbye.
“If only,” she said, tactically ignoring the meaning behind my words. While she was pliant under my touch, unable to hide the wayher body ignited for me as if she couldn’t control how responsive she was, there was still a self-constructed wall surrounding her. It had shot up when I confessed my love like the fool I was. I thought maybe it was because while we were undeniably compatible in bed, for her, it didn’t extend beyond that, and I needed to accept it for what it was. We would always be friends, but never more.
“In another life,” I thought, only when she glanced up at me with renewed sadness, I realised I’d spoken the words aloud. I moved to lay beside her, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her into my chest, unable to face her sympathetic look a second longer. There were too many unspoken words floating in the air around us, the ache in my chest suddenly back only heavier.
Beg her to come with you. Beg her to let you stay.
“Your coffee is probably cold,” I said instead, the fear still too much.
She reached for the cup and I loosened my grip on her, watching as she took a sip before flicking me a grin over her shoulder.
“You are a man of many talents, Corbin Chambers,” her smile was inexorable, her sleep tousled hair falling in soft waves around her face, like she’d just woken from a dream she didn’t want to leave. I was clearly misreading it all because some part of me thought she was ignoring what she really wanted, only I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was never meant to have more than this.
We were meant to live in separate countries. I was born to work. Never to love or be loved. Which up until now hadn’t been an issue because my career fulfilled me… until it didn’t.
I’d once been very happy with my nine-to-five, exercise and dinner for one routine, until I realised there was so much more. And the so much more was Shelby.
“What’s this?” She asked, swapping the coffee for the gift box I’d placed next to the mug.
“Just something small,” I said, suddenly wondering if buying her this was a mistake. We hadn’t even discussed gifts. Maybe she didn’tdo presents, and I was the over-zealous loser initiating something that made her uncomfortable.
She spun around, leaning against the headboard excitedly. “Can I open it?” My heart fluttered, the joy I took in seeing her adorable smile another visceral reminder of how deep I truly was. I wanted to wrap her up and pack her in my suitcase so she could be with me always.
Sitting beside her, I pressed a kiss to her shoulder. “Of course,” I said, watching as she untied the bow and gasped at the array of brightly coloured bracelets inside.
“Oh my,” she breathed, delicately lifting the first up to admire its form. The diamonds sparkled in the natural light, the pale blue of the topaz stones glistening perfectly in the early morning light. They were like the ones she wore on her arm, only I selected colours which reminded me of her. Colours I’d sent her at one point in time when she’d asked me how I felt, and I was thinking of her.
Light Rose, Blue Eyes, Sea Glass, Razzmic BerryandBig Dip O’ Ruby- each perfectly patterned with diamonds.
“These are beautiful,” she said, her eyes clouded with unshed tears. “And way too much.” Leaning over she opened her bedside draw, retrieving a wrapped gift of her own. It was my turn to frown, because I really didn’t expect her to get me anything and considering everything with her brother, I wasn’t sure when she would have found the time.
“It’s nothing special, honestly. Nothing compared to this, and I don’t want you to open it until you’re on the plane,” she said, avoiding eye contact. I nodded once, even though she wasn’t looking at me, wondering what it was and why I would need to wait.
I took the bracelets from her hand. “May I?” I asked, gesturing to her empty arm. She held her wrist out slowly and I slipped each over her hand until all five sat on her skin, looking even more stunning now she was wearing them.
“I love them,” she whispered, leaning into my shoulder admiring the way they glistened under the snow-kissed morning light. “More than you could ever know.” She added.
We sat in silence, her against my chest while she finished her coffee, both lost to our own thoughts. I watched the snow fall lightly through the window and sighed in contentment. It was the most perfect Christmas morning I’d ever had, and I couldn’t picture a better way to start the day. A content, satiated and truly happy Shelby in my arms, her presence providing a warmth which settled into the recesses of my soul.
“We should probably get up. I need to put the turkey in the oven,” she said eventually and with a quick kiss to her forehead, we got up and headed into the adjoining bathroom, our bodies instinctively reaching for each other until I took her again against the shower wall. It was softer than before, unspoken thoughts lingering in the mist and evaporating as quickly as they came. But the impenetrable bond was only strengthening every time we became one and that was my biggest worry. Because soon I was going to be heading home and for the first time in a long time, the plan I’d agreed to was making me more nervous than if I’d consented to never making another schedule for the rest of my life.
Corbin
Chapter Fourteen
The Valley, Canada
Igave up the fight of trying to sleep long before the sun rose. Between the voracious hunger to explore every inch of Shelby and the impending worry about leaving, I’d barely caught a wink. We’d spent the days inseparable, bound by invisible threads ensuring we were never more than a metre apart and it was as great as it was excruciating, knowing the end was near. I was addicted to her in a way I’d never been addicted to anything in my life. Her smell, her touch, her laugh and that body, but mostly, how she could make me smile so easily. She knew me in a way no one else ever could and that was as comforting as it was depressing when our worlds were so far apart.
We spent Christmas with Blake before he left to visit friends and we were again alone, falling into bed as soon as the front door clicked closed. And now, with nothing else to do but wait for the car which would be taking me to the airport, everything I’d been avoiding was suddenly smacking me in the face. I’d tried to initiate discussions around the possibility of more. The possibility of something I never thought I’d want with anyone, let alone my friend who lived on the opposite side of the world. Long distance was terrifying because it came with a suitcase of unknown and that scared the shit out of me. But I would take anything I could get with her because this was more than a moment.
This was emotion and feelings and something else I wouldn't again dare label.
Obviously, the discussion never happened. I choked anytime I even thought about mentioning it, and the one time I’d come close, Shelbs demonstrated she was a conversational wizard, skilled in the art of avoidance. Only now, the regret was starting to feel very heavy and very real. I was a gutless prick too afraid to express her how I felt yet too afraid to leave without telling her.
