“No. You’re my Em. Nothing more and nothing less.”
“You saw what happened in that dockyard,” I utter quietly. “Ax, I didn’t kill Carlos’s men because I had to. Some twisted, broken part of me wanted to tear them down. She enjoyed it.”
“What’s so wrong with that?” He shrugs.
“I don’t want to be the kind of person who enjoys killing people.”
“We all have a shadow.” He cups my cheek, a thumb stroking over healing scrapes and bruises. “That little voice whispering every last thought we pretend doesn’t belong to us. No one is all good, Ember. Not even the people we idolise.”
“I doubt everyone walks around thinking about killing their enemies.”
“You wanna bet?” He grins, resembling the old Axel for a heart-stopping flash. “You’re allowed to have rage. It’s what you do with all your anger that will define you. Not your shadow.”
“And if I choose to hurt people with it?”
Axel’s forehead touches mine. “Then I’ll be right behind you to pick up the pieces and ensure none of it ties back to you. I’m here forallof you. Not just the good parts.”
Noses nudging, I let my mouth ghost over his. It’s a wordless plea for some external comfort. Nothing can cure the niggling fear in the back of my mind, but Axel’s acceptance comes pretty damn close.
“Don’t let me lose myself again,” I plead into his lips.
“Never, babe. I’m here to catch you when you fall.”
His mouth secures itself onto mine more possessively. The kiss is everything I need. Affirming. Full of unconditional acceptance, regardless of my terror. Axel cradles me close, including all the awful parts that I can’t keep hidden.
“I love you, Ember.”
Lungs squeezing with equal parts surprise and jubilation, I run a hand over his silky faux hawk. My broken boy, hiding grief behind big smiles and bad jokes. My Axel. My home.
“I love you,” I return simply.
Our lips trade fast kisses, expressing all that words cannot say. Axel cups the back of my head to take what reassurance he needs, and I steal it all right back. His promises curl up into themselves in a small, protective corner of my heart, ensuring I can’t forget what he said.
He loves all of me. Not just the good parts.
Truthfully, I’m relieved.
Because I’ll need the bad parts to end this war tonight.
CHAPTER 26
AXEL
EMERGENCE – SLEEP TOKEN
Moisture drippingand the distant whirr of a ventilation system fills the otherwise lifeless silence. For a clandestine criminal lair, this nondescript storage facility fulfils every last stereotype. I expected more from the infamous Nolan Madden, despite his forced retirement from London’s criminal world.
“Three assailants gagged and bound on the roof.” Warner taps his earpiece, keeping his voice low. “We’re inside and descending. Status report?”
“In progress.” Hyland’s reply is strained with exertion.
“What does that mean?”
Silence is the only response.
We all exchange worried looks, save for the bored-looking dick hovering on the outside of our trio. Being lumped with Gunnar wouldn’t be my first choice, but my twin seems determined to ensure that his grand prize doesn’t slip out of sight.
Accessing the fire escape was relatively easy. All the buildings in Tallinn are in close proximity, the city growing on top of each other to compete with rising demand. It was child’s play to scale a nearby residential block and move across to Madden’s rooftop.
