“Uh… Yes.”
“You haven’t sustained a romantic relationship in all the time I’ve known you. Not once. If my sister’s just going to be another notch on your bedpost, I’ll save us all time and kill you now.”
“For fuck’s sake, Tom. Do I have to spell it out for you?”
“Please!” he shouts.
“Fine! Has it occurred to you why I’ve never been serious with someone?”
After a shameful glance in Ember’s direction, I refocus on my hands. One is clasped over my rumpled jeans’ leg, covering the carbon fibre joint that lies below. Another insecurity that I’ve kept buried.
Some would say it’s a reason not to be with me. But not Ember. Not once did she show an ounce of pity or judgement in the aftermath of my amputation. Nor the turbulent years that followed. She was there for me unconditionally just like when we were kids.
“I only ever wanted her.” My confession comes out hoarse. “No one else. In all my years fighting overseas, my time at Sabre, all the people I’ve met or worked with… all I wanted was Ember. To call her mine. To love her like she deserves to be loved.”
Tom’s mouth clicks open, but he remains silent. Clearly, he’s stunned.
“I should’ve owned up to it a long time ago, and for that I’m sorry. For a long time, I thought the feelings would die. Then Ember was taken, and all I cared about was bringing her home. To you. To us. The moment I saw her… it all came crashing back ten times stronger than ever before.”
When I look at Ember, her eyes are glistening.
“I’ve been lost ever since.” I pick at the label of my beer bottle.
Tom doesn’t hurl his drink at me or tell me to leave. I almost expected him to list all the reasons why us being together would make him uncomfortable. I’m sure it’s a long bloody list. But he seems to be rendered speechless by all that I’ve revealed.
“I don’t want to lose our friendship.” I catch his gaze. “But I won’t stand at the sidelines any longer. Not while she feels the same way. We’ve both been through hell to get here, and I think we should chase our chance at happiness. Together.”
Sighing in exhaustion, Tom rubs his forehead then takes a very large gulp of beer. “Well… that’s it then, right?”
“What is?” Ember inches forward on the sofa.
“The two people I love most in the world love each other.” His laugh comes out wispy, fatigued. “Who the hell am I to tell them they can’t?”
We both stare at him like he’s an invading alien occupying Tom’s skin. The same man who forbade Ember from joining Sabre Security, prompting her to move out of his apartment. He’s never backed down from an argument.
“I’m sorry… The two you love most in the world?” Jamie crosses his arms while wandering over to us. “Thanks for dancing on my grave, darling. I love you too.”
That’s all it takes for laughter to envelope us all. The back-breaking, relieving kind of laughter that cracks a soul wide open and lets the light flood into each dark, dingy corner.
Tom captures Jamie’s wrist to yank him closer then plants a kiss on his mouth, the pair still cackling away. Watching them laugh eases something inside me. An awful, crippling anxiety that’s gripped me ever since I first looked at Ember in that way.
“Your sister’s fortunate to have found someone who loves her enough to risk it all.” Jamie pushes his boyfriend’s arm. “Count yourself lucky that she hasn’t chosen an asshole.”
“Well.” I clear my throat. “We all have bad days.”
Wiping beneath his eyes, Tom lets out a long breath. “Look, I’m not going to pretend like this isn’t weird as hell for me. But I also learned my lesson the last time that I overstepped. It isn’t going to happen again.”
Ember curses to herself. “Are we sure the doctors didn’t give you a personality transplant while you were on the ventilator?”
“Shut up, trouble. I can take it all back.”
Smiling, she saunters over to her brother’s side to perch on the sofa arm. Tom rolls his eyes when she bends down to plant a kiss on his cheek.
“Love ya, big bro.”
“Alright, get off me. Love you too.”
I can’t quite believe what I’m seeing. After all that terror. The endless, anxious fretting, convinced that I could never find the courage to take what I wanted. All for it to end in two siblings putting their differences aside.
