CHAPTER 16
EMBER
BE GOOD – ROSEBURG
The shower’swarm spray beats down on me as I stare at the draining water. Despite standing here for an eternity, I’ve yet to find a speck of courage to face what lies ahead. After my meeting with Richards in a few hours, I have to face Gracie’s parents.
It’s a heartbreaking, full circle moment I’ve avoided since I returned to England. No amount of mental pep talks will make this any easier. If Gracie’s alive and we’re going after her, they deserve to know, regardless of the outcome.
“Em? You nearly done?”
Through the steamy glass, I can make out a purple-hued blur. “Not even remotely.”
“I’ve got your meds and coffee waiting. Hyland’s on breakfast duty.”
“The others?”
“Madden stepped out a while ago to make a phone call, I think. And Warner’s in his office, checking in with Tom’s medical team.”
My forehead rests against the tiled wall, already throbbing with a headache. It’s been a permanent feature behind my eyes ever since my recent seizure.
“Dimples?”
After a beat, the shower door creaks. A stray tear leaks from my eye as Axel appraises me—naked, dripping with rose-scented shower gel and boasting yellow splotches where my body is still healing.
“Hey.” Axel forces a bright smile. “Talk to me?”
“I don’t know what to say.”
“Just tell me how you’re feeling.”
“I’m not ready for today,” I confess after a beat. “I can’t face Gracie’s mum and dad after leaving her there all alone.”
“We’ve been over this. You didn’t leave her anywhere.”
“Do you think they’ll see it that way?”
“They’re fucking idiots if they don’t see it that way.”
Head lowered, I run my fingertips over the wet, gnarly skin that brands the crease of my elbow.768.I know Axel’s right. Deep down, I didn’t have a choice. That doesn’t lessen the guilt that’s been eating me alive for months, though.
I’m determined to hold it together after one too many meltdowns of late. That mental promise splinters apart when Axel steps into the shower, uncaring about his low-slung pyjama bottoms.
He tugs me into his bare chest, banding two heavily inked arms tight around my shivering torso. I snuggle into his tattooed skin, letting the soothing water cascade over us.
“Gael thinks he can break our team with these mind games.” He kisses the side of my head. “It’s your job not to let him. We’ll find Gracie on our own terms and end this for good.”
“What if it’s too late?”
“If he’s sending us those photos, then she’s still alive. Wherever she is, we’ll find her. You get to bring her home to her family.”
“Don’t do that.” I peer at him.
“Do what?” He drags the back of his knuckles down my cheek.
“Don’t give me hope.”
“Hope is what sustains us, babe. Hope keeps us alive when everything seems so fucking bleak, it feels like there’s no way out. Without hope, we’re all just waiting for fate to arrive and praying it’s kind.”
