The surprise in his voice turns to fury when he puts two and two together. “Did Kurt do this to you? Is that why you ran?”
New tears start falling, more copious than before. I hate crying. I hate feeling weak, but there’s no way I can stop.
“Bex,” Luke pulls me into his arms. “Fuck, I’m so sorry. If you don’t want to talk about it, you don’t have to. But I would like to know if that piece of shit hit you.”
I bite my bottom lip. “Yeah.”
He holds me tighter. “Fuck, sis. I’m so fucking sorry.”
His sympathy makes me feel even worse, because I don’t deserve it. “I’m the one who should apologize to you, Luke.” I sob.
My brother pulls me back slightly to look into my eyes. “You already have, babe.”
“I know, but…” I feel like it’s not enough. It’s never going to be enough for not supporting him like I should have and for cutting him out of my life.
But Luke has a huge heart. He stares at me for a long moment. “I love you, Bex. And I forgive you.”
I hadn’t realized until now how scared I was that I had fucked things up between us beyond forgiveness. But I harbored a small kernel of hope that Luke could find it in his heart to give me a second chance.
Hearing those words loosens the tight knot in the pit of my stomach, with the result of making me sob harder.
“Bex,” Luke pulls me against his chest again. “Stop crying, babe. I mean it. I forgive you. I love you.”
The feeling that expands in my chest is odd and exhilarating. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted. I feel lighter than I’ve felt since Luke was kicked out by our father. So light that I almost can’t bear it.
Bex
Once I calm down, I realize that I’m starving. Forgiveness makes me hungry and those hash browns look more tempting than ever.
“Bex,” Luke scrunches his nose, slightly disgusted when I pop two mini hash browns in my mouth. “Cold hash browns are gross. They get soggy. Let me pop them in the air fryer for you. They’ll get crispy again.”
I haven’t even swallowed, but I eat a third one. “I never want to go another day without hash browns.” I say, with my mouth half full.
Luke giggles. “Ok, eat the cold ones. I haven’t finished mine. I’ll warm those up for you. Since you’ve been deprived for so long, I think you deserve a little extra.”
He goes back into the house, coming back a few minutes later with the warmed up hash browns in a bowl.
“Do you think hash browns are bad for goldfish?” I ask, as I notice Lady Marmalade eyeing me from inside her glass pitcher.
“I have no clue. We need to get a better house for that fish, though. I doubt she’s gonna last much longer living in a glass pitcher.”
He’s right, but his words bring all the uncertainty of my situation back to the forefront of my mind. Lady Marmalade isn’t the only one who’s homeless. “Yeah. I don’t know where I’m going to find the money for that. Isn’t it crazy? I made multiple six figures with my dance videos in the last year. I shouldn’t be penniless.”
Luke looks furious on my behalf. “I wish I could say I can’t believe that our father would take advantage of you, but my pants would catch on fire if I told that big a lie.”
Anxiety floods my system, and I feel new tears welling in my eyes. When did I become such a whiny mess?
My twin brother knows me better than anyone, and he doesn’t miss the turmoil that makes it hard to breathe. “Bex, do you have a plan for the future? I’m assuming you’re not going back to Bridgeport.”
I shake my head. “I’d rather die than go back there.”
His green eyes are full of concern. “So, you have no money. Do you have anywhere to go? Any friends you could crash with?”
He isn’t saying it out loud, but the message is clear. I can’t stay with him. I knew it was a long shot, but I had been hoping against all odds that I could crash on Luke’s couch at least long enough to find a job and get my first paycheck.
My silence must say more than a thousand words.
“I’m sorry, that was a stupid question. He made sure you isolated yourself from anyone who wasn’t under his thumb, too. And I’m your only family.”
