“Weknowmany are going to die.”
“That’s a shit fucking attitude.”
This was never an issue within Death’s Wing, but I understand those that follow me have not taken the same oaths I adhere to. I have a realm of people who are in my legion that want toliveprosperous lives, at the risk of their own. Not live todie.
I pivot slightly, waving out at the ocean. “Go. Go home.”
The young one’s face scrunches. “As acoward?”
“I can’t control how others will perceive it. I also understand a man that wants to see his family,” I reply, the older one lowering his head further. “But I have absolutely no room for anyone that is going to fuck this up because he hesitates. Our collective goal is Misery. Jane ismine.” I pace back around the hard sands. “If anyone thinks Mads and Silas dying has left my mind, then Ialsodon’t want you here. We arethegroup of men that can stop a hurricane before itravishesour homes… anyone who is going to hesitate better be gone by the time I have my armor on.”
I turn back to face the ocean, stopping near the canvas bag that contains my effects, including Jane’s dagger.
Anya used to help.
Then Jane did.
Bones nears me, that violence contained exactly how I want it; I know once blades start swinging, it will be dangerous foranyoneto get near. In some ways, when I feel that he’s steadying himself, that blonde flashes in his aura again.
Maybe she’s good for him, after all.
“Where do you want me in all of this?” Bones asks while I place a shoulder piece on, fingering at the latches.
“To be me when I cannot be. I want to burn this place down, to use that very fear that they inflict on others and let them suffocate in their own smoke… going through Liam‘s scrolls, it seems that only two dozen fire mages live on that peninsula, and they’re housed somewhere near a statue of two people holding up a sphere,” I reply, wishing we had more information. “We’re targeting them, first. We will need to break up at times, and I need you to run whatever is going on like how I would.
“Ritter and I will go after Jane. She’s in a tower, and I can feel her now. Which means I’ll know how to locate her once we’recloser. And if you see Blackwell, skin his hair for me, and bring me his knuckles.”
“I’d love to bleach those,” he comments.
I affix the rose dagger with the bright red hilt at my thigh, the leather fastenings barely fitting.
Jane.
Her solitude drives me, knowing she fights fucking tooth and nail. I’ll find my desert rose, because she blooms even in a drought. Even when her roots are being actively culled, she’ll survive just out of spite alone.I want to help her with every fiber of my being, to bloody her blade and give it to her so we can get her out of there.
Andthistime, she won’t have to worry about losing it. Because she’s worth it to me. Because I can’t stop thinking about her opening up to me, to how it felt to let someone touch me so gently while being vulnerable.
If I fail here, she will disappear.
My heart is still torn in two directions as I worry for Serena, because once I’m in those waters I won’t be able to turn back.
I’ve already lost Anya.
In every way but physically seeing it, I’ve lost Serena; the threads of my heart sharply echoing like when a violin screeches. That damn witch has meddled so much with my life, I don’t know what to believe anymore. She claimed if I did this, she’ll help me locate my sister. But what of Anya’s death? She had to see that coming.
No hesitation. Jane will live. You know she will. She’ll take care of Serena.
“It’s weird to not have Anya,” Bones comments, her emptiness hitting that vulnerability that’s wide open in my chest right now.
Fuckit hurts if I let it sit for too long. If Misery wasn’t a threat to everyone I know, I wouldn’t sacrificeanyof my men.
That’s not a luxury we have, though.
“And they’re going to pay for that.”
“I still wonder how she got caught. Or why they took her, when everyone else was left behind at the shanty.”
“I never once felt fear in her… I’ve been thinking on it. I almost wonder if she purposefully hid what she felt so I wouldn’t be alerted.” I breathe slowly, as if Anya left me a note that I have to decipher. “I think we’re missing information, Bones. And that we just need toact.”
