I start to argue, but Francesca says, “If you wouldn’t mind, Gage, we’re in the brainstorming phase.No idea is shot down until we’ve heard them all.”
I nod that they should go on.I don’t have a social media platform to speak of, and I fear it becoming a he-said, she-said issue.But I allow their ideas to fill the room.
“A cease-and-desist order.Immediately.”Parminder frowns at his tablet, his long lashes shielding his eyes.“Legal counsel should be your next step after leaving our office.”
“We’ll need to develop Gage’s online presence.”Heta is apparently married to the idea of putting me back in the public eye.
Dove clears her throat.“Leah and Gage could make a joint statement.”
“Absolutely not.”I rise to my feet.
“Gage.”Francesca’s voice is gentle.
Pressure builds in my chest.It’s terrifying enough to consider putting myself on camera again.But Leah?My girl?I would never put her in that position.The problem with the public eye is that it’s omnipresent.There is no escaping it.
“We aren’t making decisions at this time.”Francesca’s voice washes over me, soothing.
I can’t breathe—my lungs won’t open.I open my mouth, clutch my chest.This is what it feels like to die.
Francesca swears.“Gage, this is a panic attack.Remember?”
It’s been years since I’ve had one.
“Count backward from one hundred,” Parminder suggests.
Everyone tries to be helpful, but Francesca hushes the team.I go through the exercises I learned in therapy.One thing I can see: the pink bloom of a succulent in the windowsill.One thing I can smell: the vanilla-scented candle on the coffee table in front of me.One thing I can touch: the faux leather sofa cushion.One thing I can hear: the whirring of a copy machine down the hall.
I repeat the cycle twice more, until my breathing is slow and even.
“Thank you for your patience,” I say to Francesca and her team.
“Of course.”Francesca reaches forward to pour a glass of water from a pitcher on the table.
Heta and Parminder look away, uncomfortable, but Dove offers me a kind smile.
Francesca hands me the glass of water, and I accept it with thanks.
“Back to the issues at hand.”I breathe deeply through my nose.My unwillingness should wipe the idea of putting Leah in front of a camera out of their minds.It’s that very thought which sent me into a dark place.It’s not happening.Ever.“I’m not getting on camera and ‘sharing my side of the story.’I don’t even have social media accounts.I’d rather hire a lawyer and sue her for defamation.”
“Going directly to litigation is unlikely to resolve the matter.It may do the opposite and exacerbate things.”Francesca keeps an eye on me, as if her watchful gaze can prevent my panic attack from returning.“You do recall that long, drawn-out case with Bret Fortune and his ex-wife?”
It was a circus, I remember that much.Bret’s band is popular, but he isn’t a household name.Normally, a B-lister like that wouldn’t get the hype his case got.But the details were so scandalous, the media couldn’t let it go.I don’t want that for me, and I wouldn’t want Leah dragged into it, either.
“That leaves us with making a statement.”Dove’s fingertips fly over her tablet.“I take it that appearing on camera isn’t something you’re willing to do?”
I straighten my fingers to keep my hands from clenching.“Appearing on camera is out of the question.”
“Understood.”Dove sneaks a glance at me, then taps her screen.“I can create an account for you on the platform of your choosing.I recommend PhotoGram for its popularity and versatility.We don’t have to post a photo of you.But I will need one for your profile picture, and to verify your account with the PhotoGram company.”
When I balk, Francesca says, “We have some of Gage’s old headshots.Will that do?”
Dove frowns, but she also nods.“I’ll draft a statement for our team to review, and for you to approve, Gage.Once we’ve decided on something, I can post it on your behalf.”
It isn’t the solution I want, but it’s the best idea we have.We discuss a few more details and logistics.Finally, I thank Francesca and her team.
Now that my meeting is finished, I have to swing by Claudia’s place in Hollywood Hills.Claudia’s house sitter had a family emergency and can’t come by this week.Claudia will be crushed if her beloved orchids perish.Because I have a spare key and know her alarm code, I’m the natural stand-in for the house sitter.
I unlock the door and punch the alarm code, then make my way to the kitchen.Claudia’s orchids are lined up in the bay window above the sink.My instructions are simple: add three ice cubes to each pot.
