I took a hot shower and wrapped a towel around my waist as I stepped onto the thin bath mat Coralie had insisted I buy to replace the one Ella had gifted me. My phone chimed. I reached over and flipped the screen up to see that it was a text from Ella.
I finished securing the towel, brushed the water droplets from my hair, and then picked up my phone.
Ella:I’m so sorry, Asher. I don’t think I can be your best man.
I stared at her words, reading them over and over again in my head. She couldn’t be my best man? Why? This solved my issue with Coralie without making me the big, bad guy who turned his back on his friend, but this wasn’t Ella. She wouldn’t do this.
But I also couldn’t beg her to stay. If she had one foot out the door, who was I to reach out and try to pull her back.
Me:Bummer. You sure?
Seconds ticked by.
Ella:Yeah. I’m sure. I am happy for you, though.
I hated those kinds of platitudes. They were used with people you were just introduced to. They weren’t the kind of thing you said to a friend. At least, not a friend you’ve known as long as I’d known Ella.
Me:Thanks, Ella. That means a lot.
Ella:You’re welcome, Asher.
Ugh, this conversation was starting to sound like a job interview. I hated it. I hated all of this. Why couldn’t we just find a place that we could get back to? Why did so much have to change in such a short amount of time.
Seconds ticked by as I stared at my screen. Our relationship had changed so much, should I still send her one of my dad jokes? Had we retreated to a place where that was no longer appreciated?
I tipped my head back and took in a deep breath. Then, I grabbed my phone and hurriedly typed a joke before I talked myself out of it.
Me:Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
It took her longer than normal to respond. A few months ago, her reply would have been instantaneous.
Ella:Why?
Me:Because they don’t have the guts.
She sent me a laughing meme, and for a moment, our relationship felt normal. But then, reality sunk in. I left my phone on the bathroom vanity and headed into my room to dress in some pajamas.
I had some houses to send to a client, and then I was going to watch some mind-numbing TV and hopefully fall asleep on the couch. My goal was not to think about Ella for the rest of the night.
Problem was, I’d never been good at sticking to my goals.
18
WILLOW
Five o’clock came too soon.
It was only the second night that Jasper and I had slept at the diner, but it was starting to feel like an eternity. Especially when Jasper seemed to think it was a sleepover party and refused to fall asleep until eleven. Once I got him down, I tried to sleep, but was unsuccessful until one in the morning.
Now, it was five and my alarm was buzzing.
Not wanting to wake up Jasper, I silenced my alarm. Then I yawned as I sat up in the armchair and rolled my head from side to side in an effort to lessen the tension that had built up in my neck. I stretched my arms out and then above my head. Sleeping upright was wreaking havoc on my body.
I’d spent yesterday trying to get ahold of Uncle Doug, but he was still out of service range. Breia was in a fight with her boyfriend, and Patricia had spent the day complaining about how small her house was and how her daughter needed to “get moving on.” Every time I even thought about asking one of them if Jasper and I could stay at their place, they complained about their living arrangements. I quickly crossed them off my mental list of people I could ask for help.
With so little in my bank account, a hotel wasn’t an option. I had no renter’s insurance, and the house was completely gone. Jasper and I were homeless with no real options. At least, not until I could get ahold of Uncle Doug.
Thankfully, the diner was quiet last night, so I was able to slip out to get some clothes and toys from the local thrift store. I felt like a failure as a mother, but what other options did I have?
