I made my way into my bathroom and shut the door. I set my phone down on the vanity and then rested both hands on the cool marble counter, dropping my head as I closed my eyes.
I knew having the wedding in Harmony was going to be a struggle. Everywhere we went, Coralie drew attention to herself. I’d wanted to elope in Las Vegas to just to get it over with, but when tears filled Mrs. Parks’ eyes at the thought of forsaking the grandiose wedding she’d always dreamed of planning for her daughters, I knew that wasn’t an option.
And with Mr. Parks’ condition, they thought that Harmony would be the best place to host the wedding. “Smaller and more intimate,” Mrs. Parks said, but I honestly knew what she meant.
Fewer eyes.
So I’d agreed. And here we were, living in my apartment with memories of Ella around every corner and with Ella’s text message sitting on my phone, waiting for a response. I was regretting ever making that concession.
Vegas was looking infinitely better right now.
I decided to leave Ella’s message alone and take a shower. Hot water always had a way of clearing my mind so I could think. Once I was clean and had pulled open the shower curtain, the bathroom was completely full of steam. I wrapped a towel around my waist and stepped out onto the plush bathmat Ella had insisted I buy along with a fresh set of towels when she first saw the state of my apartment.
I wanted to get rid of everything that I’d ever purchased with Ella, but that was the majority of things in my place. And I wasn’t sure how I could explain that to Coralie without telling her everything. My feelings for Ella would fade over time. My focus right now was on moving forward and satisfying the people in my life who I loved and looked up to. Every move I was making right now was for that reason.
Marrying Coralie was the solution everyone was looking for.
I had half my face covered with shaving cream when my phone rang. At first, I thought it was Ella calling to see why I hadn’t texted her back. It took a moment for my nerves to settle when I recognized Mom’s familiar ringtone.
I used my knuckle to swipe on my screen, and the call was connected. “Hey, ma,” I said as I returned to rubbing cream on my chin.
“Asher?”
“Yeah.” I curled my lips over my teeth as I focused on my upper lip.
“I’ve been thinking…” Her voice trailed off. From the tone of her voice and the tense silence between us, I could tell Mom wasn’t happy with something.
I paused and glanced down at the screen when she didn’t continue. “You still there?” I asked. The timer on my screen was ticking up, so our call was still active.
“Yes,” she said.
“What were you thinking about?” I finished smearing cream on my left cheek and then turned on the faucet so I could rinse my hands off.
“I just don’t know about this wedding.”
I was in the middle of drying my hands as her words settled around me. I glanced down at my phone again. “What do you mean you’re not sure about this wedding?” I hated that one phone call from Mom had me doubting the choice I’d made a week ago.
She sighed. “I just don’t want you to feel pressure to go through with it.” Her voice was soft, and I could tell that her thoughts were plaguing her.
“I don’t feel pressure.”
Silence. “Really?”
Well, if she wanted the truth, yes, I felt pressured, but illness had a way of changing priorities. I wanted everyone in my life to be happy, and if marrying Coralie accomplished that, then I would do it. After my debacle with the Proctors, I wasn’t sure I could make any decisions for myself. My decision to confess my feelings to Ella was evidence enough that I needed to hire someone who could just make my choices for me.
“I don’t want you to marry Coralie because you feel some duty to do so.”
“I know that.” I stared at my reflection in the mirror. The last person I wanted to hurt was my mother. I wanted her to be happy for me. I was her only child, and I was getting married. She should feel confident in my love for my future wife. “I’m not marrying her out of duty.”
“But are you happy?”
The truth? No, I wasn’t happy. But what would make me happy would make others miserable. And I loved everyone in this equation too much to take away their joy. So I was going to put my happiness to the side so I could watch others find theirs.
“I’m happy, Mom,” I lied and then paused to see if she could see through it.
“What about Ella?”
I swallowed against the lump that had formed in my throat. I knew Mom had suspected I had feelings for my best friend for a while now, but she had never fully come out and asked me. I guess I’d never thought she would.
