“So, I have a confession,” she continued, extricating her hand. “I’ve been dodging therapy.”
“You? But you’re so brave, Addy.”
She flashed a wry grin. “I did what needed to be done. I didn’t really have a choice.” She pinched off a chunk of bread from her sandwich and pitched it toward their growing audience of hopeful seagulls. “Funny how, once you have a degree behind your name, people think you’ve got it all figured out. I don’t, Kieran, not at all.”
“What have you tried?”
She winced, wrinkling her nose adorably. “I’ve been relying on my friend Liv, which isn’t fair to her. She’s got a crazy-busy caseload, but the therapist assigned to me…” She circled her wrist, searching for words. “He sets me on edge. His eyes remind me of a shark’s—flat, unemotional. And he mostly just repeats what I say, as if that’s supposed to cure me. So I tried a support group on base, but...” She crumpled her napkin, evading his gaze. “It’s held during the duty day, so I had to attend in uniform, and…it got awkward. All these young guys in combat specialties, and here’s me, a pampered doctor, and old enough to be their mom.”
“Can you request a different therapist?”
“That’d be selfish of me. So many people need therapy, and there aren’t enough mental health practitioners to help them all.”
“I see.” He looped his arm around her waist, snugging her closer. “Sounds like you need to find support off the base.”
Chuckling, she nudged him with her shoulder. “It never occurred to me to look. We military folks can be kind of insular, I guess. See? That’s why I need your perspective.”
“Glad to help, ma’am.” He gave her knee a squeeze. “And since we’re confessing, I’ve been dodging therapy too.”
“Is there someone you can see here?”
He shook his head. “The hospital—really, it’s more of a clinic—anyway, they lost their last psych doc a while ago. There’s a family therapist, but she mostly works with kids.”
“Huh.” She paused to attack her sandwich again, chewing thoughtfully as she stared out to sea. The seagull squad tap-danced closer, hoping for another handout.
The words pushed hard, itching to escape Kieran’s lips.Stay here, Addy. With me. Our community needs more doctors…and I need you.Before he could blurt out something so audacious, and probably scare her away for good, he stuffed his mouth with more delicious sandwich.
“Tell you what,” she said at last after tossing the remnants of her meal to the hungry gulls, “when I get back home, I’ll do some research. There must be support groups between Fort Lewis-McChord and here.”
Home.Wherever that was for Addy, it wasn’t here. His stomach sank like a stone in a pond. That’s what he got for spinning foolish fantasies.
“Thanks, Doc. That’s kind of you.” He hoped he didn’t sound as gloomy as he felt, because the threat of her departure blotted all the joy from this sweet moment.
“Hey.” Her soft hand closed over his and squeezed with surprising strength. “Look at me, Kieran. Please.”
He did, lips pressed tightly together to quell their wobble. Addy cupped his cheek. “I don’t know what to do about us. My life is such a…” She chuckled. “Well, I shouldn’t use such language around you.”
“Go ahead. Whatever it is, I’ve heard worse.”
The corners of her mouth ticked up. “Fine. My life is such a clusterfuck, I don’t know which way is up, and I may not for some time. But if you’re patient with me, we’ll figure it out together, okay?”
Addy’s probing gaze searched his for reassurance and, in that luminous moment, he could no more resist kissing her than he could stop his own heartbeat. Stroking his fingers into her hair, he lowered his mouth to hers.
“We’ll find a way,” he whispered into their kiss. “Together.”
With a resounding woof, Snoot barreled toward them, scattering the seagulls as he zoomed in circles around the log where they sat. His protective duty completed, he plopped onto the sand at their feet and stared avidly at the remains of Kieran’s sandwich.
“Can he have a bit of ham?” Kieran asked.
Laughing, Addy nodded her assent. “You’re going to spoil him, you know.”
“Give me a chance, and I’ll spoil both of you.” He tossed a scrap to the Lab, then nuzzled Addy’s neck. “But right now, the tide is turning, and the wind’s picking up. Any chance I can talk you into continuing this discussion at my place?”
She arched her throat, inviting more kisses. Her pulse galloped beneath his lips. “Right now,” she purred, “there’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”
Right now, Doc? What will it take to turn right now into forever?
Chapter Thirteen
