Shaking her head, she laughed. “Greedy ass.”
I waved her off and made my way towards the concession stand near the front. Sadly, the line was long as hell, which meant I would have to listen to my stomach much longer than I wanted to. That’s what I get for eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for breakfast. I didn’t understand it, but anytime I ate breakfast, I was usually starving by lunch. And when it was peanut butter and jelly, that starvation was ten times worse.
While standing in line, my phone rang, and just like I’d been doing for the last twenty-four hours, I sent that shit straight to voicemail. I didn’t want to talk to anybody. Not my Aunt Patricia, not Nicolette, and damn sure not Don.
“Who was it this time?”
“Don,” I replied while still looking straight ahead.
“So…you’re not going to talk to him?”
“No, I’m not.”
“Come on now, Nova. You’re in a relationship with the man. You have to talk to him at some point.”
“Maybe I don’t. Maybe I shouldn’t be in a relationship with him.”
Sucking her teeth, Kendra rolled her eyes and took a step forward in the line. “Don’t start with that shit. Just because the two of you had a little disagreement…you’re ready to kick his ass to the curb?”
“It wasn’t a little disagreement. He accused me of still having feelings for Jayson, which is ridiculous as hell. The fact that he couldn’t understand why I was so upset makes me question if he even knows me at all. I was disrespected in so many ways yesterday, and no one seems to give a damn,” I said before turning around to face Kendra.
“I get where you’re coming from, but let’s keep it real…not talking to Jayson is a bad decision.”
“What?”
“You heard what I said. You’re running from a problem that could easily be handled if you would face the situation head-on.”
Now I was pissed. “What the fuck do you mean, I’m running? Why should I have to sit down and be face to face with a man that disrespected me and our vows? Why do I have to be the one to give in and listen to the bullshit that I know is just going to be a waste of my time?”
“Because that’s what it takes to move forward. You don’t have to like it, and you don’t even have to agree with one word that he says, but you do have to hear him. Not for him, but for yourself,” she said. “Trust me, I hate to say this because you’re my cousin, and I love you to death. But you’re starting a pattern and it’s not a good one.”
Confusion washed over me. “What do you mean?”
“You’re in a new relationship, and it will be good for you if you let it. But first, you have to let go of the toxic behavior that you allowed yourself to take on in your previous relationship. You’ve got to stop running and deal with whatever the issues are.”
“I’m not always running, Kendra. When Don and I had a little spat before, I drove all the way to Dallas to tell him how I felt. Mind you, he was there with another chick, but I still ended up saying what I had to say. How is that running?”
“First of all, let’s not forget how you ended up in Dallas in the first place. It’s because you ran from the idea of the two of you being together. Then, once you got to Dallas, you tried to run again, but he wouldn’t let you,” she explained. “This time, it involves JaysonandDon, which is all the more reason for you to avoid dealing with any and everything necessary for you to move forward.”
“That’s not true.”
“Yes, it is,” she replied. “This is the shit you don’t want to hear, but you know I’m always going to be honest with you. You can’t keep running. Not if you ever plan on being happy.”
I blew out a heavy breath, my annoyance quickly taking over me. But I wasn’t sure what was bothering me more, the fact that the damn concession line wasn’t moving, or the nonsense that Kendra was spewing.
“You know what? I’m not even hungry anymore.” I hurried out of the line. “Let’s just go.”
“Oh, so it’s like that? I give you a little truth and you shut down our whole day?”
“Kendra, I don’t have time for this. I’m sick of everyone telling me what I should and shouldn’t do when it comes to my relationships. I’m a grown ass woman. I can make my own decisions. I don’t need advice from a bunch of people that don’t have a man in sight.”
Kendra’s mouth fell open as she stopped and placed both hands on her hips. “If I didn’t know you so well, I would be offended. But…I know you only act like this when I’m right.”
“You’re not right.”
“Yes, I am,” she said before grabbing me by the arm. “I’m starting to think that you’re purposely committing self-sabotage. What the hell are you so afraid of?”
Before I could even fully think, I blurted, “Everything! I’m afraid of everything, Kendra.” I rubbed my hands over my face. “I’m afraid of hearing everything that Jayson did to hurt me. I’m afraid of opening up too soon and allowing Don to hurt me. I’m afraid of it all.”
