"Knock, knock, Laney. I just came to see if you're hungry," she says softly, entering my room.
"I'm not hungry," I say, keeping my eyes trained on the streams of drops running down my window.
I hear her footsteps as they lightly tread across the floor to my bed, where it dips when she takes a seat. "I understand if you don't want to talk. You can take as much time as you need, but I'm glad you're home." Her hand squeezes my ankle. "I've missed you so much."
I don't immediately respond. Instead, I let myself feel the warmth her presence brings to my room. I'm tired of being alone. Sure, I've had my friends by my side through thick and thin, but no one understands you more than your blood. My mother used to be my best friend, and I turned her into a stranger.
When my words don't come quick enough, I feel her stand. "Mom…"
"Yes," she answers gently.
"He asked me to marry him," I say, my voice trembling with nerves.
"Oh, honey." She reclaims her spot on the foot of my bed.
Once I completed my hours and received my certifications, I called to let her know I'd be staying in Bardstown. I caught her up on all the cases I worked on over the summer and told her how Asha asked me to work for Fairfield full-time. I had discussed all the easy stuff before finally telling her that my neighbor was once again London Hale. I could hear it in her voice. That detail caught her off guard. She could hear the happiness in my tone, and at the time, I read her trepidation as normal mom worries. She didn't want to see her daughter's heart get broken again. I dismissed it, and now I wish I hadn't.
"You said no?" she treads lightly, trying to understand and not push.
"He took me to the cabin his great-grandfather built for his wife. It was beautiful, not only the property but the sentiment behind it. The love they shared and the legacy they left for their children. It was perfect, only to be made unforgettable when he asked me to build a life with him in that very same spot and be his wife…" I pause as the sweetness of the memory tightens around my throat. How could we go from that to him sharing a bed with Madison in less than twenty-four hours? I blow out a breath, needing to finish the story and get it off my chest, release the pain so I can get through it. "I said yes… I said yes, and then the next day, when I came over after running errands, I walked in the front door and found his ex walking out of his bedroom."
I didn't even know Madison was back in town. After Gypsy was cleared to leave Hale Ranch, she and Abbey were back on the road, traveling the country and doing shows. Since London and I were officially a couple again, and she didn't have any roots in Bardstown, I didn't expect to see her again, but then there she was, just as pretty as ever, and there he was, standing in a towel. Ifeel the contents of my stomach rise, and I sit up, trying to push it back down.
Her arms are around me before I can blink. "Oh, Laney, I'm sure there's an explanation. London loves you. I know he does."
"No, Mom, I asked him." I pull out of her hold. "I said, 'Tell me this isn't what it looks like,' and he looked me in the eye and said, 'I can't do that.'"
"Oh—" A loud knock at the front door silences her response. "Now, who could that be? There's practically a monsoon coming down outside." She gets up. "I'll be right back."
No sooner than the front door opens do I hear him. "Where is she? I know she's here," he says, his voice laced with panic.
"London, I don't think she wants to see you right now," I hear her say seconds before my door swings open, and he's standing there soaked to the bone, with a bruised temple, dark circles under his eyes, and a thousand apologies written across his face.
I drop my eyes to my lap, unable to stomach seeing him. It hurts too much. I love him, even after he hurt me in the worst possible way. I love him. I will never stop loving him. But I have to love myself, and that means letting him go.
"Laney." He drops to his knees before me, giving me no choice but to look into his wild eyes. "I didn't cheat. I promise you. You have to believe me. It was the perfect storm, and I capitalized on it. I knew you'd think that. I knew what it would look like, but God, I swear I didn't touch her. I could never do that," he says, chest heaving.
"I asked you… I looked you in the eyes and begged you to tell me differently, and you didn't," I say, my words stronger than I feel.
"I know… I know, okay." He reaches for my hands, but I pull them out of his grip.
"Maybe you didn't cheat, but you still chose to hurt me. You hurt me with the worst possible lie ever, and I don't see how that's any better." This time, my voice cracks.
"No, no, no." He starts to lose it, tears pooling in his eyesbefore he drops his head in my lap, hands fisting the material of my sweatpants. "You don't understand?—"
"Don't you dare." My voice is steel now. "Don't you dare give me that excuse again. That's the same bullshit that tore us apart before. I'm done, London. I can't keep doing this with you. This isn't just about us anymore. I know that's why you're here now. You were fine pushing me away again, sacrificing us for whatever fear is eating you alive, until you found out about the baby."
I told Fisher not to tell him, but I knew all bets were off when I left town. I knew he wouldn't keep my secret. Fisher was every bit as hurt and mad as I was. It's why London's lip is split, and his temple is bruised. His best friend was hurting for me.
"Two parents constantly in and out of love? That doesn't work for me. I want my baby to have stability, and if that means I have to do it alone, so be it."
The words hang in the air like a death sentence. London goes completely still—not just quiet, but statue-still, like every molecule in his body has frozen. His hands, still gripping my sweatpants, don't even tremble. He may have heard the news but not from me, and hearing the confirmation from my mouth is clearly a different beast altogether.
"You're pregnant," my mom says with a sharp intake of breath.
"Mom—" I turn toward the doorway, and she's pale as paper.
Shit. I was so caught up in London's unexpected appearance I hadn't thought through revealing my pregnancy. Of all the ways to tell your mother you are pregnant, your fiancé storming through the house, black and blue on the heels of a scandal, is not it.
