“What store?”
Lyra sighed, the tension in her back dissipating. “It just said ‘Thrift,’ in big black letters. Right in the middle of downtown.”
“I’ll talk to her, sort it all out. She’s got nothing to worry about.”
I kissed her neck and dropped my hand from her waist, taking up the other side of the reins once more, though her horse knew to walk the edge of the ring without any guidance.
“You got a name for her, yet?” I asked, hoping to pull her from her thoughts before she’d get trapped in them again.
“Not yet. How’d you come up with Bee?”
I chuckled. “Maybe if I tell you how I spell it first, you’d be able to guess. It isn’t B-E-E. More like…just ‘B.’”
Her head flicked over her shoulder, bright brown eyes dancing around my face. “You’re kidding.”
“Smart as a whip, you are.”
“Is it short for what I think it’s short for?”
“Butterflies everywhere, Ly. Can you tell I really fucking missed you?”
She burst into laughter. “I think I have a name.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.” Patting the horse's mane, she said, “Army boy.”
I snorted. “Try again.”
“Metal head. Or metal co—”
“Ly.”
“Nora.”
That funny thing with blue and yellow colors was happening again, flashing before my eyes like a hazy dream.
“Nora,” I repeated, letting my mother’s name roll from my tongue with ease after being left unspoken for so long.
“She was the kindest a mother had ever been to me.”
I breathed my wife’s sunshine in, thinking of that same tune they loved. The way they both lit up a room without trying. My thoughts possibly carried on too long, the crunching of grass and leaves beneath hooves and steady breaths the only sounds for several minutes.
“How…when…” Lyra’s words barely carried on the faint breeze.
“Did they die?” I finished.
“If you don’t want to talk about it, I understand.”
“No, I do.” My thumb grazed her thigh. “It’s just been so long since I let myself think about them in that way.”
“Not bein’ here?”
“Yeah. I acknowledged it enough, but not the way that was healthiest.”
She turned enough to meet my gaze. “I’m here, Car.”
“Yeah.” I pinched my eyes shut, exhaling loudly. “Not long after you left, I started spiraling. I’d stay out from early in themornin’ ’til late at night, drive into different towns, searching restaurants, bars, churches…really any building I drove by. Even abandoned ones. I didn’t really have a clear head and it started making my parents real concerned.” Her touch was subtle. Comforting along my arm.