Chapter Ten
Malena
“How painful was that? Scale of one to ten?” Leif asks, shutting and locking his front door. “Mr. Olsen is in bed. I put the leftovers in his fridge. I’ll stop by in the morning before I head to the airport for jumping to make sure he knows they’re there.” He eyes me up and down almost as if he’s appraising for damage.
Eva and Celia were delightful during dinner. I think they had a coming to God moment while Leif and I spoke alone in the bedroom. After we returned to the kitchen, they seemed to be on their best behavior. Leif didn’t question their change in demeanor, and I was relieved because it made things easier on me. For all intents and purposes, it was a nice family meal. Something I’ve not had in years. It made me miss my mom.
Sighing, I dry the last dish and put it away in the correct cabinet, and then turn to meet his steely, blue gaze. “Zero. It was actually pretty awesome. They aren’t nearly as bad as you say,” I reply, smiling. “They love you.”
“To death,” he adds. “Listen, I know we didn’t plan for tonight to go down like that, but I want you to know I’m glad you met them. I want you to see all of me.”
I swallow down the fear of the unknown. “Leif, I see you whether you realize it or not, you showed your heart to me far before your sisters told me you’re a weak swimmer.”
He palms his chest. “I am a fucking amazing swimmer,” he returns. “And there’s nothing wrong with my swimmers.” His face pinks. “That just came out. Sorry. That’s insensitive.” I flop down on his sofa. “There isn’t anything wrong with your swimmers. That’s okay to say. Remember, I’ve dealt with infertility for most of my adult life. I have a spine—can handle any joke,” I explain. “Though, I’m glad your parents didn’t come over tonight. I want to fix myself up before I meet them. Be a presentable human,” I say, picking up the edge of my shirt and setting it back down. “I look like a slob. If your sisters say anything about me, anything at all, you are bound to tell me.”
He grins. “There’s no way you want to know what they’re going to say.”
“Why?” I swallow down all of my insecurities. They go down like razor blades. I know I’m not good enough for Leif. His sisters will have noticed that right away. They’ve already had to bail me out of a situation and their brother is footing the bill. I’m a charity case. Now it’s my job to prove to them I’m more than that. That I am a deserving person even if I don’t feel like one. That I’m worthy of a man like Leif Andersson.
“Because they are inappropriate, Malena. No other reason than they’ll probably discuss our sex and foreplay routine as casual conversation. Their filters are broken. I’d never subject you to that kind of talk. They won’t have anything negative to say about you. You guys got along perfectly. You can’t really be worried about what they think about you. Are you? They loved you.”
I shrug. He closes the space between us. “Don’t. Don’t do that,” Leif says.
“You say you’re not, but in my eyes, you’re pretty damn close to perfect. You have an amazing career, a caring family, a sense of honor and humor,” I say, licking my lips. “Leif,” I add, “You are generous and kind.” I wave an arm at his body. “You’re fucking sculpted like a marble statue. Museum quality. Except better, because you’re not missing a head or a hand or a finger.” Leif presses his lips into a firm line, trying his best not to laugh at my comparison.
“And I, well, I struggle with almost everything. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see we aren’t a balanced pair. What if I always need you more? More of your time. More of your attention. More of everything? Because that’s probably how it’s going to be. You still have to give as much to your job as you were before we met.” Using my other arm, I wave to the hallway of awards, signs he’s amazing in his career as well. “What if you don’t have time or energy for me?”
“Are we arguing? Is this our first argument?” he asks, tilting his head, smiling.
I shake my head. “Don’t smile at me that way. I’m serious. This is hard for me to accept.”
Leif sighs, and sits down next to me, laying his hand on my bare leg. “Am I greedy if I say I want you to want more of me? That’s not a negative. Not at all,” Leif says.
I try to concentrate on his words, but he’s touching me, and any time he touches me, I turn into a rabid sex creature with only one thing on my mind.
“I am busy. My commitments are heavy, but that doesn’t mean I can’t rearrange things to fit you in my life. Especially because that’s what I want. When I want something, I make it happen. In case you forgot,” he says. “Chicken wings.”
I rub my forehead. “The past few days have been a lot. You’ve been amazing. I guess I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop because good things don’t happen to me very often.”
“When is the last time someone did something nice for you?”
My friends will do small gestures here and there. It’s not like my life is completely devoid of kindness, but Leif has gone above and beyond. I try to explain to him the difference between a friend favor and a family favor, which is what he’s done for me. He tells me he understands, but he’s rubbing my leg up and down.
I watch his hand intently, and abruptly stand and step away from him. “It’s probably time I get home. You have to be up early and I have to quit the store tomorrow, or at least give my two weeks’ notice I guess.”
Leif stands. “I have a crazy idea.”
“Oh, no.”
“Spend the night with me?”
I swallow hard. “Is it the sex? You want me for sex. That’s it.” I try to keep a straight face. “You’ve had a taste and now that’s all that it’s going to be about between us.”
“I won’t fuck you tonight even if you beg me,” he replies, shaking his head. When he bites his lip, my panties soak all the way through. We didn’t get enough of each other earlier. It’s a fact we’re both aware of. The glances are steamy, our bodies find a way to touch each other without our permission. All of the signs of dangerous chemistry ignite the oxygen surrounding us. “We can stay up late and talk. Like a chick sleepover. I know how those work. My sisters were good for some things.”
That gets me. I laugh, holding my stomach as I bend over in hysterics. When he doesn’t laugh, I meet his gaze, mystified. “You’re serious? You want to have an actual sleepover? Like, fuzzy slippers and popcorn?”
Leif lays a hand on his chest. “I am serious. Will you have a sleepover with me?”
