I want to finally clear my conscience. I know this won’t be enough, but it’s a start. So, I focus on each time the belt lashes me, forcing myself not to arch my back or scream. If I start, his men will hear all the way at the gate and think he’s skinning a fucking cat. I doubt any of them would even bat an eyelash. As a woman, they might check on me, but I doubt it. I’m here with Javi, so they won’t rescue me from him. They’ll follow his orders.
I breathe through the pain, forcing myself to focus on it and not let my mind wander. I wait for the next swat, but it doesn’t come immediately. That was only five. I expected several more. I open my eyes yet again, and I see he’s unwinding the belt. I open my mouth to disagree, but I watch him fold it in half.
He brings it down on my upper thighs, and I stomp my feet. He landed the first five in the same spot. Now he covers my ass, including my horizontal crack. The pain’s different. It’s not as breath-stealing, but it still hurts far more than I imagined. It’s more of a diffused pain that radiates up my back and down to my knees. I swallow over and over, stomping my feet to keep from crying.
“Maddy, it’s done.”
He tosses the belt halfway across the room like it’s a snake ready to strike him. He helps me up and pulls me against him. His heart’s racing even though he appears calm. He didn’t enjoy doing that. I wonder if this ever happens when he’s—fuck it. Let’s be real. I’m certain he tortures people. There’s no delicate way to put it.
“Are you all right,chiquita? Talk to me. Was it too much?”
He sounds ready to panic. Fuck. This hurt him as much as it did me.
“I’m all right, Daddy. I needed it. I feel?—”
I stop to think about that. How do I feel? I mean, beyond the obvious pain. Did this help?
“I feel lighter. All of it is still on my conscience. I haven’t absolved myself completely. But some of the guilt from not telling you sooner’s eased. You don’t seem to feel better for it.”
“I hate knowing you feel guilty enough to need that. I don’t enjoy inflicting this kind of pain on you when I don’t think you need the punishment. If I use a belt again, I’d rather it be part of bringing you pleasure.”
“You’ve sworn to take care of me, and this is what I needed. It didn’t fix everything, but I’m not carrying those secrets anymore, and I don’t feel so ashamed of everything I’ve done or let happen. I know you know I repent, and that’s really important to me.”
“You won’t sit comfortably for a few days. You’ll remember exactly what you did wrong, and you’ll remember you’ve taken your punishment. Maddy, I want to be sure you know my forgiveness is unconditional. When you admitted what happened and apologized, I forgave you. These problems aren’t over, but anything that might have come between us is gone. We’ll deal with all of this together.”
“Thank God.”
He squeezes me around the waist before scooping me into his arms. He carries me into the bathroom, where the full tub is waiting for us. I completely forgot he’d run the bath. He puts me on my feet and sticks his fingers in. I’m certain it’s completely cold by now. My ass would love it, except he flips the plug and lets half the water out. He refills it with water warm enough I see some steam.
“Test it,chica.”
I stick my hand in and nod. “Perfect.”
He turns the water off and gestures for me to get in, but I shake my head.
“I told you I wanted to wash your back. Aren’t you getting in?”
“If I strip, I’ll fuck you. Let me take care of you a little more before that.”
“Fucking me would definitely count as taking care of me, Daddy.”
“You know what I mean, tease.”
I shrug one shoulder as I take the hand he offers and step into the tub. He put in enough bubbles that they’re practically overflowing from the tub as displacement pushes them up when I slide down to cover my shoulders. The water’s cool enough to ease the sting in my ass without me getting cold easily. He perches on the edge and nudges me to lean forward. I wrap my arms around my shins, and he rubs my shoulders. My eyes drift closed. I’m in heav-en!
I feel my shoulders lower, and my head rests heavier against my knees. I inhale enough to fill my lungs and marvel at Javi’s magic fingers. They find knots I didn’t know I had. Knots upon knots upon knots, apparently.
“Please, join me.”
“Lean back first.”
He helps me lie back, and I slip under the water, soaking my hair. When I emerge and wipe water from my eyes, I find he already has his shirt off. He’s fucking magnificent.
“Keep looking at me that way, and I shall embarrass myself.”
“I doubt that. I think you’re going to do just fine.”
Am I drooling? I’m practically salivating as I watch his pecs and abs flex as he undoes the button and zipper on his pants. They fall to the floor. It doesn’t surprise me when he picks them and his shirt up and loosely folds them before putting them onthe counter. He’s not the fussy type, but I know he likes things tidy. He slipped off his socks when we kicked off our shoes before getting on the bed. Even his feet are sexy. He has high arches and long toes. I’m not particularly into feet, but even that part of him is manly. He pushes his boxer briefs down, and they show the sexy AF V over his pelvis like an arrow to his dick. Then I see the grooves on the side of his hips that scream for me to put my hands there while he thrusts into me.
