“I’m certain you’ll find out on your own within the next five minutes.”
If either of the men were carrying their legitimate IDs, it’ll be easy for Pablo to look that up. If they weren’t, but they each used one of their known aliases, it’ll only take two minutes longer than it should. If they were smart and didn’t carry any ID, then I might get lucky. I don’t know if the Diazes have access to dental records.
I’m certain they won’t recognize the men as being ones from the city or even New Jersey, so that leaves Albany. It won’t take much of a guess to know these guys are from a syndicate. It won’t be difficult to narrow down which one. So, all this shit’s going to come to a head in the next few minutes.
My mind’s rapidly working through this devolving situation, and I’m realizing it’s getting worse by the moment.
“Maddy, I’m certain you know I’ll figure out who these men are. Do you really want me to learn the truth from Pablo, or would you rather I hear your side of the story first?”
I’d much rather he hears my side of the story, but he’ll ask more questions I can’t answer. Then I’ll just look awkward. That’ll make it worse.
No, worse is you being resistant. Be forthcoming, and perhaps there’s a chance to salvage whatever might have been between us.
I can’t fight the temptation to rub my forehead anymore. My head’s pounding, and the closer I come to sharing any details, the more I want to vomit. The bile’s burning the back of mythroat, and tears sting the inside of my eyelids. I feel my heart rate racing, and Javi must feel my increasing sense of foreboding or hear the death knell over my head.
“All right, Madeline?—”
“Don’t call me that.”
I try to get off his lap as he rejects me, but his hold only tightens.
“You’re not going anywhere until I’m certain you’re safe, and the safest place is in my arms.”
“You still believe that? You still want that?” My voice trembles with each of those questions.
“Of course I do. You’re the one who doesn’t seem to agree.”
“Is that why you used my full name?”
“Yes, you’re the one putting distance between us, but I’m not the one who wants to.”
“Using my full name says you want distance.”
“And you refusing to tell me any of the truth—give me even a clue what’s going on—screams far louder than what I said. It’s obvious since the moment I walked into your hotel room, you’re hiding from someone. I already figured out someone mistreated you. I didn’t grill you on who, and I haven’t dug around even though I could. I’ve wanted you to share this on your terms, but you’re not giving me much of a choice but to either demand you share what’s going on, or I pry into your life with or without your permission.”
“Prying implies you’re not looking for permission, Javi.”
“True. So, decide now, Maddy, what’s it going to be? Do you tell me the truth about what’s going on, or do you leave it to my cousin to tell me, or for me to assume the worst before I dig?”
It would be so much better if I just told him the bits I can. I’ve spent years keeping these secrets, cultivating stories to deflect. I could tell him ones I’ve used before, but he’ll see through those lies. He’s already told me not to tell him any. He’d rather Irefuse to answer, but that option’s no longer available. I’ll start out slowly. Hopefully, feeding him a couple of bites will tide him over for now. I’m kidding myself to think that, but it makes it a little easier for me to start.
“The guy I was seeing back home got into some shit he shouldn’t have.”
That makes it sound like it was a choice.
“It complicated things between us, and I discovered he has a temper. When things went wrong, he needed a scapegoat, or an outlet. That became me. I don’t know all the inner workings of what he was doing, but he was also very possessive. He didn’t want to let me go.”
That’s such a bland version of the truth, that if it were chicken, it’d be unseasoned and boiled.
Javi remains quiet, waiting for me to divulge more, but that’s what I’m ready to share.
“Little one, I won’t push you any further for now, but those men weren’t just petty criminals. It’s obvious they’re in a syndicate, and considering you lived in Albany, it makes it pretty damn easy for me to guess which one.”
Fuck my life.
“I’ll keep my word, and I won’t ask for more. Just know I’m already figuring things out. I’m waiting for you to confirm them.”
Hopefully, he thinks one of them was my ex-boyfriend, and that the guy I dated was pretty low-level.
