“Kitchen it is then,” she said, trying to swallow down her apprehension and avoiding Finn’s gaze.
She took herself off to the island and pulled herself up onto one of the Perspex chairs. She was even more confused now than ever. Finn wasn’t wrong when he had said he doesn’t let people close to him, here she was in his house and she had absolutely no idea what was going through his mind.
Despite this, there was an amicable silence as Finn dished up the most delicious looking casserole and fresh, crusty bread. Archie stayed by his heels the whole time, looking up expectantly for dropped crumbs. The silence was giving Edie the space to calm her heart and re-gather her thoughts. His handsomeness, the way he used up all the space around him, his confidence, they had all certainly caused Edie’s mind to wander into unknown territory, and now she had to rein it back in. There was a folder with the details of the trial in her bag, so Edie reached over to where she’d left the bag on the island and pulled the file out.
“Here we go,” Finn said eventually, placing a full, wide bowl in front of Edie. “Wine, water, gin and tonic?”
Edie looked up from her papers and laughed softly when she saw Finn’s apron.
“Just the tonic for me please?” she said, hoping he didn’t question her lack of alcohol.
“Ice and lemon?”
Edie nodded, packing away the work papers in her bag and dropping it to the floor beside her. She breathed in the steam from her dish and realised how hungry she was. At just a little over fourteen weeks pregnant now, Edie was coming out of the constant nausea that had raged her body if she hadn’t fed it properly. Now actually ravishing, a wash of the old familiar feeling hit her for six, faced with food but also the politeness not to tuck in until her host was also ready to eat. She broke a little of the bread that Finn had served straight out of the range and popped it in her mouth.
“You okay?” he asked, sounding concerned. “You’ve gone a little clammy. I hope it’s not my cooking! Do you want me to check you over?”
Edie flinched.
“No, no. Honest, it’s just my sugars. Just realised I haven’t eaten properly today that’s all. I’ll be right as rain after this. It smells amazing.”
She thanked him for her drink and as soon as his backside hit his own chair, Edie tucked into her dinner. It was as delicious as it smelt. Was there nothing Finn couldn’t do?
Again, the familiar, comfortable silence descended as they both ate. Archie’s paws tapping on the tiled floor and the scraping of cutlery were the only sounds that filled the large room. Edie felt satiated, both by food and drink, and by the fuzzy feeling now flowing through her body at the niggling thought that this talented gorgeous man might have an inkling of feelings for her. No matter how confusing that idea may be. She was just out of a loveless marriage and pregnant with her ex-husband’s baby. This was not the best time to be falling for another man.
“Can I tell you my story?” Finn said, mopping up the last of his food with a large chunk of buttery bread.
Edie wondered if she wanted to hear Finn’s story. If she wanted to turn her work brain on while they were eating dinner together, then reminded herself that Finn wasn’t asking for therapy, he wasn’t asking because he needed to be fixed. He was simply asking to share his story with a friend.
“Of course,” she replied. “Is this what you started to tell me the other day? Why you built a wall?”
Finn nodded. “I might need something stronger than this though.” He drained the last of his water. “Would you like to join me?”
Edie shook her head, still hoping Finn wasn’t going to question her reasons for not wanting to drink. But he accepted her refusal without a qualm. The glug of the ice cold gin made Edie’s mouth water, but she made do with a top up of tonic and some more lemon. Finn also brought over to the counter a small plate of chocolate covered strawberries and some frozen grapes.
“I know these strawberries look as though I’m hankering after some weird notion of romance, but in all honesty, I find they stave off my sweet cravingsandthey’re one of my five a day. And these grapes are to die for.”
“Spoken like a true health care professional,” Edie said, trying a grape and not quite believing she’d never thought of freezing grapes before. They were divine, and probably exactly what she would have needed to help with her morning sickness. “Though I could have sworn we are supposed to be the worst when it comes to looking after ourselves. You obviously do though.”
Finn looked sheepish and Edie realised what she had just insinuated.
“I work out a lot. And I run too.” He took a strawberry from the plate and Edie couldn’t help but notice how the juice made his full lips look even more kissable than before. “But looking after myself has been ingrained since I was younger.”
Edie tried to concentrate on the words he was saying, rather than the mouth that was saying them. She could sense that this was not easy for Finn.
“My family have a history of illness, but maybe not the kind of illness that eating strawberries instead of ice-cream for pudding would have changed.”
Archie padded over to his master and laid his head in Finn’s lap. Edie wanted to cuddle them both.
“Both my mum and my grandma died at a very young age from breast cancer. My mum was first, I was only eight, so I didn’t understand what was going on, only that mum spent a lot of time in bed and had stopped going to work. I used to climb into bed with her and she’d read me a story, then one day she didn’t have the strength to hold the books anymore, so she’d make them up herself. Then, when she couldn’t stay awake long enough to make them up, I knew I had to do the reading.”
Edie could feel tears prick her eyes as Finn’s stared into his gin and tonic. She reached out a hand and placed it on top of his.
“Not long after she died, my grandma—her mum—fell ill too. It was too much to bear for me because I’d seen it all happen with mum. I wonder now if maybe Grandma didn’t want to have any treatment because she missed my mum too much. I’ve not spoken about any of this since I left Aberdeen.”
Finn bit his top lip, his breath ragged. Edie didn’t say anything, she just kept her hand on his, knowing that space was the best way to allow Finn to carry on with his story. He eventually regained enough composure to carry on talking.
“I took up medicine to try and save the world from this awful disease, and for a while it almost helped me. When I was training to be a doctor I was married, you see.”
