“That’s a sinister lie perpetrated by Hollywood. You can have as many dreams as you dare imagine.”
I pulled a dubious face. “That just sounds like a long list of things to mess up.”
“To truly want something is to make yourself vulnerable.” He gave me one of his most uncertain smiles—the ones I half believed were only for me. “None know that better than I.”
He kind of had a point. “I still can’t quite believe you came all the way to Kinlochbervie.”
“I have crossed continents, risked millions, and ruined lives in pursuit of my business aims. Why do you believe I would do any less for you?”
I couldn’t help wondering how the whole situation would have played out if it had been reversed. Probably I’d have hidden under the nearest duvet, emerging only to scavenge for food in ruined supermarkets after the fall of civilization, and Caspian and I would never have seen each other again.
Urgh. I sucked. “I…I’ll try to do the same,” I said. “I mean, if you ever need me to come for you.”
He laughed, not in exactly in a nasty way, only I hadn’t made a joke. I guess it had sounded like one given he was, well, him and I was, well, me. And I couldn’t quite imagine in what topsy-turvy looking glass world he would need me to play rescuer. Getting into stupid scrapes was my gift, not his.
Reaching for my hand, he tucked it into his. “Send your article to Milieu.”
“Okay. Okay. Fine. But when they say no, and I’m crushed and my life is over, I’m blaming you.”
“Firstly, they might not say no. Secondly, if they do, you’ll find something else.”
“What something else?”
“It doesn’t matter. Whatever quickens your magnificent heart will eventually bring you success.”
“You really believe that?”
He gave me a look so full of warmth and pride that, right then, I could have turned tides. Pulled the stars from the sky. “I do.”
“Does, um, multinational banking and financial services make you feel that way?”
“It doesn’t have to. I’m not you, Arden.”
He sounded sort of quelling and sad. And both were walls, in their way. I gave his cold fingers a little squeeze. “It doesn’t mean you have any less right to happiness than I do.”
“You make me happy.”
I couldn’t tell if that was romantic or a lot of responsibility. Maybe both. “Then you better make damn sure we spend more time together in London. No more abandoning me in One Hyde Park.”
“Of course not. I shall endeavor to make myself available to you.”
“I like the sound of that.” I wriggled into a sitting position and tucked my knees up—although considering everything that had happened on this plane, modesty was pretty irrelevant right now. “When?”
“Pardon?”
“When are you going to make yourself available to me? I want names, I want places, I want dates.”
His hand went to his mouth, I think covering a smile. “When I said to pursue what inspired you, I didn’t mean my schedule.”
“It’s not your schedule I’m after. It’s you.”
“Oh.” He looked oddly abashed. “Arden.”
“What? You can’t give me life advice and then go weird when I follow it.”
“No I…I simply wasn’t expecting you to apply it immediately. And to me.”
I shrugged bit self-consciously. “Well, you quicken my heart. And also other bits of—mmfff.”
