He was back to being his easy self and it was like none of that had happened. When everything inside of her was scalded red with the fact that it had all happened. His ability to revert right back to form was just annoying.
“I do like mini marshmallows,” she said.
“I know.”
There he was, that man who knew her so well.
He even knew her favorite movie. And he brought their hot chocolate to the couch for her, and queued that movie up quickly.
“Your favorite movie isLord of the Rings. You pretend it isn’t but it is.”
He looked at her. “Yes. But I don’t pretend that it isn’t. Who doesn’t love a good medieval road-trip film?”
“I’m just making sure that it’s clear that Idoknow you. I know what you like.”
That sounded so stupid. She took the mug of hot chocolate from his hand and held it close to her chest.
“I never said that you didn’t,” he said.
“Well, I didn’t know that you had been trapped in a cave.”
“I chose not to tell you. It’s not a commentary on your observational skills.”
“It feels like it is.”
“The way that it makes you feel isn’t my fault.”
“Well. I guess.” She pulled her knees up to her chest as he pushed Play on the movie. “Thank you. For jumping into the water with me. It was nice to not be alone.”
She hadn’t been alone. Not through any step of this. He had been there the whole way. Even when he was annoyed. And somehow things still felt jagged and disconnected between them. When yesterday it had all been fine. Except not really then either because she had looked at him and she had lost her breath.
She didn’t like this.
She was beginning to feel panicky. She would rather jump back into an icy pond than contend with this.
The familiar introduction music soothed her to apoint, and she let herself get carried off in this storyline that she knew by heart. The characters were like old friends to her, and she was suddenly deep in her feelings aboutthismovie that had been so formative to her.
Maybe because she was a kid who had wished that she could be an adult. Not because she was awkward like Jenna in the movie, just because she didn’t like her parents having control over her life. She had wanted to grow up. So that she could be an organized businesswoman and have the life that she created rather than the one that had been given to her.
Of course, things did not go well for Jenna in the film, but there was something about the fantasy that had been the perfect escape for Rue.
Of course there was the romance. When Jenna finally realized that she didn’t want a romance with the popular guy, but with her best friend, who had been the right one all along.
Rue felt like she had been punched straight in the chest.
No.
Her favorite romantic comedy was not a psychoanalysis of deep-seated feelings about her life and her relationships. She just liked the scene where they all did the “Thriller” dance. That was it.
She didn’t live in New York; she had no aspirations to. She didn’t want a big job. She liked her little yarn store in her small town. See. Totally different.
Anyway. She looked to the side; her best friend was not the slightly awkward-looking kid. Her best friend was the stunningly handsome hard-body jock. So tospeak. The unobtainable one. Well. He was obtainable. Just in a very specific way. He was hers. Sort of.
She looked back at the movie. She sipped her hot chocolate slowly, trying to make it last, because it provided a little bit of a distraction. But then for some reason she turned to look at him, at the same time he was looking at her.
Her stomach dipped, then hollowed out.
Oh no. Ohno.
