With one last glare at the fuckboy, whose red eyes were crinkled up in the corners as a huge grin stretched across his face, she turned her back on him and said to Suyin, “I’m going outside for a smoke.”
“I thought you quit.”
“Not tonight.”
Suyin cocked a sculpted dark eyebrow.
“Whatever. Don’t look at me like that.”
The humor bled from her expression. “You sure you’re okay, Ris?”
“I’m fine. Just tired.”
“At your own birthday party?”
“Yeah.”
“Right.”
“Stop giving me that look. Seriously, I’m fine. I’m just going out to smoke.”
“You want company?”
“Nah. I’ll be right back.”
“Well, I’m going to talk to the fuckboy if you won’t.”
“He’s all yours.”
Iris’s lip curled as the words nearly stuck in her throat. Slipping away from Suyin, she kept her eyes fixed ahead to avoid catching anyone’s gaze and being drawn into conversation.
With her own friends. At her own birthday party.
“Hey, Ris!” someone called, but she pretended she didn’t hear them and sped up toward the balcony door like her salvation lay on the other side. She didn’t let out the breath she’d been holding until she was safely outdoors, the hum of the party muted through the glass.
She stuffed her hands into her hoodie pocket and cursed. She didn’t even have any damn cigarettes. She hadn’t bought any because she told herself she was quitting—again. She’d told herself she wasn’t going to keep feeding her shitty habits and watching herself spiral further down the drain.
“Fuck my life,” she said aloud.
Damn it, it was bloody freezing out here. It was mid-February, and they were right in the middle of a cold snap. One did not go outside without a coat in Montreal winter.
Yet Iris was doing just that for no other reason than the fact that she didn’t want to socialize. All her life, friends had been her outlet, her safe space, her distraction. And now, here she was.
Deliberately alone, and somehow, still feeling lonely.
Meph elbowed his brother in the side because he knew it would annoy him. “How many phones have you jacked so far?”
Sure enough, Raum shot him one of his classic murderous glares, his bright-gold eyes narrowed dangerously. “Dunno what you’re talking about.”
Raum was a bit of a klepto, and Meph knew a house party full of drunk humans would be too much of a temptation to resist.
“Your pockets are looking pretty heavy there. Mind if I just reach in and see what’s—”
Raum punched him in the arm hard enough that his hand went numb.
“Fuck, dude!” Meph cradled his wounded limb. “Take it easy.”
“Be nice, Raum,” Lily said offhandedly. Mist loomed beside her, and the two of them were watching Eva and Ash, who were behind the DJ table playing with the gear.
