He waved a tattooed hand at her—a heavily tattooed hand. Black-ink designs covered his fingers, the back of the hand, and his palm. From what she’d seen, his whole body was similarly covered. The only space left was on the right side of his face.
“You’re hot,” he said simply. “I can see why Raum’s all worked up about you.” It wasn’t flirtatious, but rather the way one might state the color of the sky or the state of the weather.
“Thank you?” She was flustered but oddly complimented, especially because she was still clad in her shapeless angel robes. “Is he here? I need to speak to him immediately.”
To her annoyance, Meph didn’t open the door further. Instead, he propped a shoulder against the frame like he was settling in for a long debate. “Why?”
“It’s an emergency.”
“What’s the emergency?”
“I have answers about his—ourpast that I need to share with him.”
Meph’s head tilted as if he was oblivious to her urgency. It made her want to shake him, and she might have done just that had he not been standing on the other side of the pesky wards.
“What are your intentions with my brother?”
Her mouth dropped open.He can’t be serious?
But as he continued to stare at her, red eyes unblinking, she realized that he was in fact serious.
She wasn’t prepared to answer questions about her feelings for Raum. She was hanging on by a thread that was already fraying. The past had so utterly overwhelmed her, it left no room for consideration of the future.
She’d left her cell phone at the rental suite and couldn’t call Raum herself, and while she could easily flash there, she recognized the importance of gaining Meph’s trust. All she had to do was force herself to open up.
“I care about him very much,” she managed.
Meph’s brow lifted, creasing the tattoos above it.
“We have a history. We’ve known each other for a long time.”
“You’re still an angel, and he’s still a demon. How’s that gonna work?”
“I don’t—” She rubbed her face roughly. “I have no idea. I just know that I care about him too much to let him go again, and we lost too much time because of other people’s ideas about what is right and wrong, and I refuse to lose any more.”
“But you can’t go back to your job if you want him. You’d be putting him in danger. So what would you do for him? Would you give up your whole life?”
This is a damned interrogation!But she had to admit that Meph’s concerns were valid.
“I don’t know,” she said, her impatience forcing her to get straight to the point. “I honestly don’t. As I said, I only know I care about him too much to give him up.”
It was cathartic, in a way. In the heat of the moment, there wasn’t time for anything but the truth. Until now, she hadn’t been sure how to answer these questions. But now, she realized shehadknown all along, and she’d just been reluctant to admit it.
“You’re right,” she said suddenly, “I can’t go back. I am in love with a demon, and I will never be the same. If I were to return to my old life, I would be forever unfulfilled. Not just because of my love for him, but because of who I have become, how I have changed. I’m someone new, and it’s high time for me to let go of the past. I am Sunshine, not Shamsiel. Shamsiel was the broken one, and I don’t want to be her anymore.”
Her eyes widened as the truth of her own words hit her. They kept flowing out, and she surrendered to them and the changes they would bring to her life.
“Shamsiel is dead. She died in Hell, at the hands of the demons that held her there. Sunshine was reborn, and I am proud to be her. She is a survivor. She is the real warrior, because she fought her own inner battles and emerged victorious.”
Meph looked uncomfortable now.TMI much?But she was on a roll, and she wasn’t stopping now.
“I would fall and become a Grigori if that was what it took to keep Raum safe, because I will always love him and seek to protect him. And that protection defaults to those he cares about as well. So in answer to your question, what would I give up for him? I suppose the answer is everything. Even Heaven.”
Meph seemed to have been stunned into silence, and she didn’t blame him. It was quite the tirade of words that had spilled forth, and far more information than she’d intended to give.
“You should probably say all that to Raum,” he finally said.
“Yes, I know that!” she snapped. “That’s why I asked you to get him. Now please, will you?”
