“ButI’m trying to keep everyone safe, and sometimes that means making hard choices. And I’ll do it every time. I don’t give a fuck who hates me for it.”
There was a silence in which everyone stared everywhere except at each other.
Eva had once told them their level of emotional constipation was equivalent to an impacted bowel requiring emergency surgery. They’d all grimaced at the image, but she was right. They really were terrible at talking about feelings, and Bel was probably the worst of them all.
But he was making an effort, so Raum supposed he would too. “I get it.”
That was all he said. But it was better than nothing.
“You’re always so sullen and quiet,” Bel muttered. “I never know what the fuck you’re thinking. Truth is…I worry about you sometimes.”
Meph coughed. Ash looked vaguely nauseated. Mist found something really interesting outside to look at. Raum grumbled, “I’m fine.”
“You never tell us shit.”
“Thought you didn’t care.”
“We care.”
“Alright.”
“Next time, tell me you have a girlfriend first, so I don’t try to kill her when I meet her.”
“Fair enough.”
“Good. That’s settled then.” Bel uncrossed his arms and everyone relaxed. “I’m going out.”
Ash spun around to look at him. “What? Where?”
Now everyone was staring at Bel. Poor guy hadn’t left the house much lately because of his anger issues.
“For a fucking walk, I don’t know,” he snapped. “Calm down.”
First he was napping and now he was going for walks? Raum was almost afraid to find out what would come next.
At least he didn’t have a car. Belial with road rage was a terrifying thought.
27
A Drop In The Bucket
Sunshine had stayed in bed a long time after Raum left, tangled in the sheets and lost in her thoughts.
First, she’d assured herself repeatedly that Raum was wrong, and there was no possible way her memories had been rearranged. Then she’d remembered the first time she’d seen him, and how she’d been transfixed by his golden eyes and the glower he projected at the world as if daring it to challenge him. She’d thought of the desire that awakened in her as they drew closer, the need for intimacy growing as they formed an emotional bond.
Why him and only him? In all of her life, no one else had reached her that way. One would think such a deep connection would take years to form.
Three hundred years perhaps…
Why not look into it? What could it hurt? If she found proof Raum’s theory was wrong, then at least he’d have closure. If his idea truly had no merit, she shouldn’t have felt such resistance to discussing it.
It was almost as if she was deliberately avoiding it…because she was afraid of something.
Surely somewhere in the Empyrean Library it was recorded what he’d done to warrant his punishment. Surely once she had that information, her questions would be answered.
And she owed it to him to try.
Suddenly charged with purpose, Sunshine opened the nightstand drawer and dug out the phone she’d purchased back when she was planning the trap for Raum. She didn’t want to leave things as they had, so she typed out a brief text message to him, explaining where she’d gone.
