“Oh.”
She returned her attention to the mirror. He frowned. There was something different about her tonight. Instead of joking, she was quiet.
“Is something wrong?” he asked.
She put down her brush, turned out the lights on the vanity, then crossed to the large bed. But instead of joining him under the covers, she settled on top of the blanket and pulled her knees to her chest.
“I heard people talking at the party tonight,” she said.
So that explained it. “I’m not surprised. A lot of them haven’t seen me in years. A few probably thought I was dead.”
That earned him a quick smile. “I’m confident they were pleased to see that you weren’t.”
“Don’t be so sure about that. My competitors would like nothing more.” He stuffed a second pillow behind his head. “Tell me what bothered you.”
Cathy drew in a deep breath. “I wouldn’t say bothered, exactly. It’s just—” She shrugged. “I know it’s none of my business.”
“I don’t have very many secrets.”
“I heard two women talking about Evelyn,” she said. “One of them knew her, and the other had only met her a couple of times. They said you weren’t in mourning for her because you’d never loved her.”
Now it was Stone’s turn to hesitate. He shouldn’t be surprised that people were talking. After all, he was prime fodder for the gossip mill. He had been for years. His time in solitude would have only made him more interesting…at least to some people.
In the back of his mind, he’d always known the truth was going to come out. It had to at some point. Cathy was too much a part of his world to be kept in the dark, he decided. As long as he didn’t tell her everything.
“I guess it’s time to come clean,” he said lightly. “It’s a long story, so you might want to get comfortable.”
He patted the pillow next to him, but she shook her head. “I’m fine here.”
She was sitting on the bed, but he felt as if she were a million miles away. He realized he would have been more comfortable telling her this while she was in his arms. At least then he wouldn’t have to depend just on facial expressions. He could read her thoughts in the tension in her body and the way she pulled back or hugged him close. This way she could keep her thoughts to herself. Which was probably what she wanted. Well, there was nothing he could do about it.
“You know that Evelyn and I were friends,” he began. “After college I went to work in the family business. Evelyn was staying in school to get her MBA. My parents realized they had a son in his midtwenties and they decided it was time for me to get married. They threw a series of parties and invited all the young women they considered eligible. I knew that I was expected to choose one of them.”
He thought back to those days. It had been summer, he recalled. Because Evelyn had been around a lot. His parents hadn’t wanted to include her but they knew better than to exclude his best friend.
“I didn’t think it would be that big a deal,” he admitted. “I had never been in love, but I’d always had plenty of girlfriends. I thought this would be more of the same. But marriage is a serious business. Somewhere along the way I decided they weren’t going to make me choose someone just because of who her parents were and how much money she would bring to our family. Tensions got very high between myself and my parents.”
He remembered the fights. His mother’s pleas, his father’s cold anger. The older man had taken him aside and informed him that every Ward for generations had been marrying for the good of the family. It was the first time he’d realized that his parents hadn’t been a love match.
“I wanted more,” he said simply. “At least that’s how it started out. Then I got stubborn and decided that I wasn’t going to pick someone they approved of. One afternoon I was complaining to Evelyn about the situation. I told her all the qualities I wanted in a wife. Someone bright, easy to talk to, with a great sense of humor. I remember we were sitting on the beach. I’d escaped for the afternoon. She looked up, smiled and said, ‘Someone like me.’ I knew then she was right.”
“So you proposed,” Cathy said.
“Yes. And she accepted.” He rubbed his eyes. “I don’t know what I was thinking. In a way I thought we were just joking. But when she started talking, I realized she was serious and she thought I was, as well.”
The past returned, as it had many times before. “She said we would be good together, and I knew she was right. We’d always gotten along well. We liked the same things, had the same dreams. So I decided to go along with it, at least for a while. My parents were furious. They reacted in the worst way possible—they forbade me to marry her.”
Cathy nodded. “That just made you more determined, right?”
“I was twenty-six years old. Of course I dug my heels in.” The story was harder to tell than he’d realized. He knew he was to blame for what had happened between them back then. There had been so many signs.
“We had a long engagement,” he said. “Over a year. I’m the one who pushed for that. I guess there was a part of me that knew what we were doing was wrong, but I didn’t know how to stop it or make it right.” He cleared his throat. “A couple of months into our engagement, I realized that Evelyn was in love with me. She had been for years. Marrying me was all she’d ever wanted.”
“And you didn’t want to hurt her,” Cathy said softly.
He nodded. “She was so incredibly important to me. I thought I could make it work. I loved her, but as a friend. At the time, I didn’t think there was a big difference. I was wrong.”
There were many things he wouldn’t tell Cathy. Personal things that he and Evelyn had shared. He still remembered the first time they’d made love, but not the way most men remembered that event. Evelyn had been so eager. He’d known she was a virgin and he’d put it off as long as he could.
