“You’re right.”
They giggled together like schoolchildren. While Cathy had greatly enjoyed the opportunity and it had been fun getting out to face down her fears, she was pleased to be back where she belonged. Here, in Stone’s presence, her world was right.
He asked about different people. She answered as best she could, trying to put faces to names. As they spoke, she studied him, the way he moved his hands when he talked, the slight tilt of his head as he unconsciously kept his scarred side turned away from her.
Shehadgrown to love him. She’d figured that out last night at her birthday dinner, and today only confirmed that information. She wanted to do him proud. Not just because she worked for him or cared about him, but because he was the most important part of her life. She didn’t want to think about a world without him, even though that was inevitable.
He leaned forward and gave her a quick hug. “You did great, and I’m very proud of you.”
He started to release her almost as quickly as he’d reached for her. As if he’d just realized what he was doing. Cathy had a split second in which to make a decision. She knew it would never be more than physical—at least not for Stone. It would never be emotionally meaningful or anything permanent. Stone would offer her an affair, and if she could live with that, if she could make it enough, then this was her moment.
In an act she knew would count as one of her bravest, she let him release her, but kept her hands on his shoulders. His expression shuttered. Her heartbeat increased and the butterflies returned, bringing all their friends and relatives to the party. She told herself that she would survive the rejection, that emotional pain was rarely fatal and that for once in her life she would be regretting action instead of passive acceptance. Then she pressed her mouth to his.
She waited for the heat and tingling that had engulfed her the last time they’d kissed, but there was only a painful pause during which she wondered if he would respond or push her away. She realized then that the sparks between them had required both their participation. Her heart thundered twice more before she figured out he wasn’t going to kiss her back. Instantly humiliation flooded her. She’d been wrong last night. He wasn’t interested in her in that way. How could she have made such a mistake?
She pulled back. Hot color flooded her cheeks. “I’m sorry,” she managed to say. “You must think me…” Her voice trailed off. She didn’t know what he was thinking and she didn’t want to know. She’d been a fool. She wanted to die. She wanted to run away and never see him again. Most of all, she wanted to turn back time a little more than five minutes and have this to do over again.
She tried to stand, but her legs were trembling. She pushed off the sofa again, this time using her hands for extra leverage. Suddenly Stone grabbed her upper arm. His firm grip held her in place.
“Why did you do that?” he asked. His voice was low and harsh. Obviously the moment had been so repugnant, he could barely speak.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered again.
He shook her. “Why?”
Compelled by reasons she couldn’t explain, she looked at him. Something dark and dangerous lurked in his blue-gray eyes. His mouth was stern, and a muscle clenched in his cheek.
“I thought you were interested in me. Not romantically,” she added hastily, not wanting to increase her humiliation more than necessary. She swallowed and averted her gaze. “I thought, last night, when we danced…” She shrugged.
“I was aroused,” he said flatly.
She nodded. “I thought that meant you wanted me.” The last two words were barely audible. An hour ago, she’d been on top of the world, confident of her looks and her capabilities. Now all she wanted was to crawl away and hide under a rock like a slug or a roach.
“I can’t—” He hesitated. “My past,” he began. “There are things that I can’t explain.”
“I know. I wasn’t expecting anything more, Stone. I thought it would be nice.”
For the first time since she’d kissed him, his expression softened. “If it was just ‘nice,’ we would be doing something wrong.”
She didn’t respond. After all, she had no frame of reference. “I’ll understand if you don’t want me to work for you anymore. I’d rather not quit, but I will if you’d prefer. However, if you’re willing to give me another chance, I promise I won’t ever say or do anything like this again. I’m so very sorry.”
He released her arm and raised his hand so that he could cup her cheek. “Cathy, I wonder if you even know what you’re saying. You act as if I’m angry or insulted.”
“Aren’t you?”
“No. I’m flattered. I can’t promise you very much, but I do want you. Make no mistake about that. My concerns are all for you. That this isn’t what you really want.”
Some of the humiliation faded. “I kissedyou. How could I not want this?”
He gazed at her for a while. “We are talking about becoming lovers.”
Thank goodness she was already blushing so he wouldn’t notice the fresh wave of color that swept over her face. That word. No man had ever said it to her before.
Lovers.
“Yes,” she murmured.
He rose to his feet without saying anything. When she spoke his name, he pressed his fingertips to her mouth, then took her hand. They left the office and walked down the hallway, turning left at the end and stopping in front of a closed door.
