“That’s great news – isn’t it, Alex?” Josiah glanced back to find him slumped on his pillows, his eyes dark and empty.
“He’s been through a lot,” Sofie murmured.
“I know, and not just in the past few days. This isn’t just the work of his encounter with Grant. It goes back long before that.”
“I know.” Sofie stroked Alex’s hair gently. He closed his eyes and was immediately out. “He’s spent, Josiah. He kept going for years because of Solange, and now he’s got nothing left.”
“Poor bastard.” Josiah gazed at Alex anxiously. “He keeps taking so many knocks, one after another, and he’s been living on adrenaline. I’m not surprised he’s crashed. I’m just amazed he kept going so long under such intolerable pressure.”
“He’ll recover,” she said firmly. “He’s strong.”
“I’m not so sure… after all he’s been through.” Josiah gazed down at Alex despondently, feeling helpless.
“He’ll recover because he has you,” she told him.
“I’m not sure I’m enough. I’m nobody’s idea of a shrink.” He shrugged, and his wounded shoulder sent a spike of pain through his body, making him grimace.
“You care about him. You’re probably the first person who’s truly cared about him in years.”
“I know, but I’ve been walking on eggshells around him. He’s moody, volatile, and veers between looking for a fight and wanting affection – sometimes both at the same time. I’m not sure how to handle him. I want to help, but I’m so out of my depth.”
“Don’t give up on him.”
“As if I would. That’s not who I am. When I fall in love…” Josiah shook his head. “I’m all in. Thing is, though…” He paused, feeling small and lost. “I don’t think he’s in love with me. He likes me, sure, but he’s viewed me as a fantasy figure for years. I was the one who’d come along and solve all his problems, keep him safe, arrest his enemy, and help him keephis vow to his dead friend. I think he’s slowly waking up to the fact that I’m a real person, too, and maybe not the person he thought I was.”
“Oh, I think you’reexactlywho he thought you were.” She smiled. “But he’s exhausted after so long having to conceal his true thoughts and emotions. Now he doesn’t have to hide them, and you’re seeing years of pent-up anger, sadness, and despair pouring out of him. And you’re only seeing it because he feels safe enough to show you. That’s how much he trusts you.”
Josiah gazed at Alex’s pale face, his dark eyelashes resting on his still unnaturally white skin. “I’ll do whatever it takes to make you better, Alex,” he vowed, and he meant it. He’d do anything in his power to heal this broken man, give anything, endure anything.
“You don’t have to do it alone,” Sofie told him, reaching across the bed to gently squeeze his arm. “I’ll never forget what you both did for my brother. Alex gave up his chance to escape because of Sem, and he’s been an excellent nurse to him. All those hours he spent with him, playing cards, watching the screen, chatting, and he was nothing but patient – helping him to wash and use the bathroom. If it weren’t for Sem, Alex would likely have been with you at Inquisitus instead of staying behind at the house for Neil to take him. I won’t forget all you’ve both done for my family, and I’m here for you. You can do this, Joe. I’m not saying it’ll be easy, but there are so many people who care about you, and we all have your back. Reed lost his prized duck because of you, and you should have seen how fast Esther dropped everything to get to the hospital and make sure you were okay.”
“Poor Cam.” Josiah gave a rueful shake of his head. “He loved that duck.” He glanced up at her. “Thank you, Sofie.”
“I mean it,” she said fiercely. “You’ve been saving indies for years and you probably hardly ever see them again. They say nogood deed goes unpunished, and it must have felt that way when Peter was killed. Well, I want you to know you didn’t just save Sem’s life – you’ve made a friend for life in me, too.”
A lump rose in his throat. He’d never asked for thanks, but all the same, there had been times when his self-imposed mission had felt very much like a thankless task. She squeezed his arm again, and he dipped his head, his eyes blurry.
At that moment, the nurse entered. “Sorry, my loves, but he needs rest and visiting hours are over. You can come back later.”
Josiah leaned over and pressed a kiss to Alex’s cold cheek, but he didn’t wake up.
“Come on – I’ll take you home,” Sofie said.
“No – you’ll take me to the office,” he corrected. “I need a long chat with Esther.”
Nobody was expecting him in the office, least of all Esther, who gave him a disapproving look and rolled her eyes when he walked in.
“I told Baumann to take you home and make sure you rested,” she chided.
“Don’t blame her – I insisted. I’m fine, Esther. The last thing I want is to sit around at home when we have so many things to discuss.”
“Fine. Let’s get on with it, then.” She sat back in her wheelchair with a sigh. “Firstly, don’t ever go to the Quarterlands alone again, and that’s an order.”
“I grew up in the Quarterlands. It’s really not that scary.” He shrugged.
“Regardless, those are my orders.” She fixed him with her sternest glare.
“Fine.” He sat down, feeling a little weaker than he wanted her to know. Resting his hands on his knees, he looked down until his vision cleared.
