Lennox raked his eyes over Brinley’s curvy figure as she walked just slightly ahead of him, her fingers tracing along the detail of a miniature, Grecian-styled statue positioned in his backyard. She seemed enraptured. He knew he was.
It had been scarcely longer than twenty-four hours since they’d last fucked, and considering that had been the tail end of her off-cycle heat, she certainly needed more rest. But damn if he didn’t want to just walk up behind her and sink inside what he already knew was the perfect pussy. Let her cling to the statue of someone’s interpretation of an old god while he pounded into her and filled her with his cum, again.
Lennox gave his head a hard shake and dragged in a breath in an effort to clear his mind. And that was when he finally realized something that had been right in front of him all damn morning. “I can smell you.”
Brinley squeaked and her shoulders tensed before she slowly turned, putting the statue behind her. “That’s not the most gentlemanly thing to say.”
He frowned and stepped closer. “Did you forget your lotion? Or are you not taking your suppressants?”
Her cheeks flushed as she tilted her head back to keep his stare.
He loved the way she so rarely shied from his stare, almost as much as he loved that blush.
“I can’t,” she finally whispered, her blush deepening. “I won’t cycle properly if I take the suppressants, so I … have to wait.”
Understanding dawned. Because they were half bonded, they were on the not-so-proverbial clock. She had to choose whether or not to accept him before the completion of her next heat. If her next heat was unnaturally delayed there was risk of interrupting or possibly outright shattering a bond they might otherwise wish to forge. Even he knew there wasn’t a lot of research behind the correlation between omega hormone suppressants—which were limited as it was—and mate bonding.
Brinley blew out a breath and moved into his space, resting a hand on his chest. “I have a wild idea.” She searched his eyes for a second, but didn’t wait for him to prompt her. “Let’s talk about ugly things.”
Lennox arched a brow.
Her lips twitched. “If we’re going to seriously consider a lifetime together, we need to be able to at least have civil conversations about the difficult, more controversial things. The things that rip families apart. The things that spur violent mobs and protests and even wars.” Her smile faded. “Let’s talk about religion, tolerance, and politics. And of course, an omega’s place.”
It was his turn to smile. She was right that those could be ugly topics, and certainly were known to drive wedges between loved ones. It wasn’t a bad idea at all.
Lennox kissed her forehead, then curled an arm around her back and adjusted to aim them toward the house. “Let’s sit down with lunch and settle in. We have all day.”
Chapter 10
Acceptance
Theytalkedabouteverythingfrom religion, to disaster relief procedures, to immigration, and of course, the innate rights and importance of an omega’s well-being within the semi-secret subculture of their non-shifter society. The conversation progressed from room to room as they talked over lunch, moved somewhere more comfortable, paced, settled, and repeated at random until it came time for dinner. Yet despite the weight—thesignificance—of the conversation, Brinley never felt truly agitated. Not with Lennox, at least. Nor did she feel any flares of his agitation were ever meant for her.
Somewhere after sunset, as the lengthy talk of necessary unpleasant things slowed, Brinley came to one other realization.
The entire time, in fact even before they arrived at his massively oversized secured property, she had continued to think of Lennox as hers. Her alpha. She’d caught herself with the thought since the first night, of course, but it was worse now. It was worse because it didn’t just feel like a giddy, maybe somewhat possessive, schoolgirl asserting a meaningless claim. It felt real.
She reached up without conscious thought and rubbed at the base of her neck, her fingers pressing into the faint bruise of the mark he’d left there. It didn’t hurt. The ache that followed came from somewhere deeper.
“Brinley?” Lennox rose from his seat across the coffee table and rounded to her in two quick strides, dropping to a crouch inside her personal space. He laid a hand over her nearest calf and slid his palm up to her knee. “Is something wrong?”
There was just one hard question she still needed to put to words.
Brinley drew a slow breath and stared again into his eyes. The brown had taken over the green for most of the day, and this moment was no exception. “Love is … a fairytale,” she said quietly. She dropped her hand back to her lap. “At least, it always has been for me. Growing up the way I did, no matter how cautious I thought I was or who I offered my trust to, in the end, I was always abandoned. Left behind, unwanted—unloved.” The word stuck in her throat and she had to swallow awkwardly.
Lennox frowned.
She plunged ahead before he could interrupt. “I thought I’d finally turned that hope off, but then … I met this man, this alpha, who actually bit me. Who says he wants me. Who might not be the monster I was warned most alphas are. And now I’m … scared.” Why was this so much harder to say than any one of the things that could easily have landed her kicked on her ass outside a gated suburb with no means to get herself home other than her phone? She willed back useless tears and kept pushing out the words. “I’m scared that I’m falling way too fast and I can’t imagine what I’ll do if—or when—my alpha pushes me away.”
He rumbled and his hands skimmed up, over her body, until he was cupping her face in his palms. Suddenly he had leaned forward, half-wedged between her knees, and his nose brushed against hers as his low, steady voice reached her ears. “Change and commitment can be frightening things. I understand. Especially when you’ve been betrayed in the past.” His fingers slipped into her hair. “But listen to me, Brinley. You are wanted.” He angled his head to tease her lips with his, just for a moment. As if adding physical punctuation to his words. He held her stare, and his position, as he quietly added, “You are loved.”
Her chest constricted, the breath seizing in her lungs.
Lennox leaned up enough to kiss her forehead with almost startling tenderness. “Forget the fucking fairytales. Most of those stories were originally nightmares, anyway.”
She choked on an unexpected, watery laugh. “They were.” Tears rushed her eyes again as she unfroze and reached up to glide her hands over his shoulders. “Lennox…”
He eased back enough to meet her gaze again.
