“He’s going to rage,” she said quietly.
“Yeah, well.” Brennan hitched one shoulder. “After that, he’ll calm down.”
“His dad made it sound like he’s self-destructive. Like he was drinking too much to cope with everything.” She rolled Connor’s words from earlier that evening in her mind. “When we were still at the bar, Connor said something that sounded straight-up suicidal.” She swallowed heavily. “He said when he thinks about this stuff, it makes him want to throw himself in the river. And his dad wascruel. He said awful things about Connor when I was over there.”
“His dad’s just at a loss, L.” Brennan lifted his hand off her arm to rub the side of her head. “Itwasself-destructive. His parents were and are worried. Their son was floundering, and they didn’t how to help. All his dad knows is the Army. And that’s where they deal with weakness by beating you into submission.”
“Do you think he’s suicidal?”
A quick, sardonic laugh exited Brennan’s throat. “Yeah, I do. Why do you think I permanently latched onto him like this? It’s not exactly because of his sparkling personality.”
At that, Liza had to laugh, and he rubbed her head again.
“It’s that damned flaw of mine,” he went on. “I have to save people. Connor and I didn’t serve together, and we weren’t even in the same branch, but he’s my brother-in-arms, and people like us have a tendency to have a problem. We carry the weight of survivor’s guilt like nobody else. And that can be deadly. We have this phrase in the military. ‘I got your six.’ It’s like on a clock face. You’re at the center of the clock, and the six is at your back. On a battlefield, your six is your most vulnerable point. So, when we say, ‘I got your six,’ it means, ‘I’m here. I’m looking out for you. I’ve got your back. I’m going to take care of you.’ And unfortunately, the battlefield at home can be even more deadly. So, this is where it’s even more important to have someone’s six. And I can’t be that for everyone, but if I can be that for one person, I’m going to. So, I decided a long time ago to be that for him.”
Liza clutched her chest and looked at him through fresh tears in her eyes, but Brennan just stared at the far wall.
“You love him, L.,” he prompted.
Her chin trembled, and she squeaked out, “I do. So much.”
He turned to look at her through glossy, reddened eyes, and then he quietly said with a little crack in his voice, “Then have his six. He’ll get to a point where he’s got yours, too.”
She pressed her lips tightly together and tears spilled out of her eyes. “I feel like I spend ninety-five percent of my life crying.”
Brennan slipped his hand into the inside pocket of his suit jacket and pulled out a handkerchief, then dabbed her eyes. “It’s okay to cry, L.” He handed her the cloth, and she continued to wipe her face. “Didn’t your mama ever tell you that?”
Liza huffed. “No. My parents have always been selfish, heartless, and absentee.” She wiped her nose and folded the cloth into a small square. “You should’ve heard them when they came to see me at the hospital after my wreck. Theyscoldedme for getting pregnant in the first place.”
Brennan scoffed and rubbed his eyes, wiping them dry. “Jeez.”
“Yeah.” She pulled the blanket tighter around her and nestled closer against his side. “So, did I cock-block you again?”
He broke into hearty laughter and rubbed his forehead. “Jesus, L.” He wrapped his arm tighter around her and kissed her head. “You know, when I’m with you, the last thing I’m trying to think about is my cock.”
Liza covered her mouth with the blanket and snickered. “Sorry.”
“It’s okay.” He picked up the remote off the side table and switched on the TV. “But seriously, don’t ever worry about calling me when you need something. I can always find another woman to entertain for the night, but you’ll always be my number one lady.”
She pushed her elbow into his side. “Until I find you a great girlfriend.”
Brennan exhaled long and loud as he flipped the channel. “Stop.”
She tsked.“No.”
24
Algiers Point, New Orleans
“We need to talk,” Liza said as she pulled her car onto the I-10 West ramp, just in time for evening rush hour traffic, and Connor resisted the urge to groan.
The wordswe need to talkhad the magical ability to make a person recall every bad thing they’d ever done in their life. Connor had a list of bad things a mile long, the majority of which were related to Liza in some way. And now he was trapped in a car with her for God knew how long because of end-of-the-work-day traffic.
“Shoot,” he said as his mind drifted to the previous weekend and Oscar’s release party, during which a large chunk of the night was missing from his memory. One minute he was losing control of his balance and his tongue, saying things to her that were too revealing for his own comfort, and the next minute it was late afternoon the following day, and he woke up on his living room floor.
Given all the things he was trying so desperately to keep from her, combined with an almost insatiable attraction to her, there was no telling what he might have done in the missing time.
In his peripheral vision, Connor saw Liza’s shoulders rise and fall as she appeared to take a deep breath, but she didn’t say anything just yet. And that made his mind drift to her behavior that week, which was curious to say the least.
