I was tempted to start with that, but stopped myself.
“Is he kicking?” Grace asked with a huge grin.
“Yes. He’s getting more active. Since I stopped helping out in the kitchen, I spend a lot of time reading Alaran children's books to him. He seems to like it.”
Both Grace and I had received translator upgrades, that taught our brain how to read and write the Alaran language. “It’s tough to keep myself occupied sometimes. That’s why I like when we can have lunch together.” Grace didn’t need to know I was having trouble coping at times. Especially seeing how happy Grace was with Trex. I wished things were going better for me here.
“It's great to see you finally settling in.” She said, giving her teacup handle a gentle stroke.
“I don't really have a choice.” My tone was resentful, and her expression made me feel guilty.” I added, “don’t get me wrong, I’m glad you and Trex allow me to stay here at the palace... I am going crazy thinking about life after the baby's arrival.”
She reached out and squeezed my hand. “Please don’t be concerned. I’m here for you, and you can stay as long as you want. I would miss you if you left. It sounds selfish, but it’s true,” she said, chuckling. “Have you considered your plans for after the baby arrives?”
“It would be nice to teach again someday.” I shrugged and my mouth twisted in one corner. I missed seeing my students and having a job to go to.
A staff member poured tea for each of us, and Grace thanked him and took a sip before picking up a sandwich. “I am sure you will get to teach again. When you’re ready.” She took a bite of her sandwich while I watched.
The sleeveless dress she was wearing highlighted her curvy figure, and my eyes widened when I noticed the beautifully detailed, colorful patterns on her wrists.
“Grace! Are those what I think?”
She placed the rest of her sandwich on the plate and extended her arms to show me the colorful marks in red, blue, and gold.
“They are the same mating marks as Trex has on his chest...I expected them when we first bonded. Rekna believes that their sudden appearance is due to me carrying a half-Alaran child,” she said, beaming.
Delighted, I let out a high-pitched squeal. “Oh, Grace that’s fantastic! You both must be so happy. Wow...how far along are you?”
The sheer delight I felt for her had me squirming with excitement in my seat.
“We are. We both can't wait to be parents. It seems I am about three months pregnant...I didn’t want to say until I knew for sure.” Her skin was glowing, and I shook my head surprised that I hadn’t clued in sooner.
I pointed to her wrists. “When did they appear?”I hadn’t seen them, or maybe I just never noticed?Then I recalled how she had been wearing long-sleeved, summery dresses a lot. It was clear she'd kept them concealed until now.
“When we bonded, I had hoped they would appear, but Trex said not to get my hopes up because I am human and they might not. Then, about a month after I conceived, they began to show.”
“Wow. That’s amazing. Our children will be close in age. If I am still living here after he or she is born maybe they can play together and will one day become friends?”
It was painful knowing I would never have an Alaran/human child. I wasn’t good at romantic relationships and I’d only ever had one boyfriend. When Roger broke up with me, I wasn’tsurprised, but I was hurt. He had never been attentive, and never made me feel like I mattered to him.
When I saw the way Trex was with Grace, I knew I deserved better. Part of me worried that I’d never find someone who would love me. However, I had come to terms with being alone, particularly with the added responsibility of a child.
I released a long breath, wishing I could quit fantasizing about having an adoring alien mate like Grace.
It hurt to know that the only person I would consider a relationship with, didn’t want me. Joining a human colony seemed like the only way forward for me. Grace gaped at me. “Are you really thinking of leaving, then? Once you’ve given birth, I mean.... I didn't think you were serious about it.” Her mouth sunk into a sad smile.
Nodding, I chewed my bottom lip, holding back tears to avoid spoiling our lunch. My hormones were making me way too emotional these days. When I could speak without crying, I said. “In all honesty, a human colony would be a more logical choice. Plus, I can’t expect to stay here for free forever.” My gaze fixed on my teacup as I continued. “It’s not just about me now.”
I glanced at Grace. “Baby deserves the best shot at a good life.”
I wasn’t being completely honest with myself or Grace, but things weren’t looking up for me here. I craved a life beyond what I had and I craved a mate of my own. It was painful to see Orin, wanting him and knowing there was no chance to be with him.
I didn't think he knew I was pregnant on the ship, but now that I was showing, he would know. Being pregnant ensured he would not want to be with me.
My friend went silent, and took a sip of her tea. Then she reached over and squeezed my hand, as she was so fond of doingwhen she wanted to comfort me. Grace was like an older sister to me and we'd become fast friends.
“Take your time. Don't rush into this important decision.”
Nodding in agreement, I glanced down at the food in front of me. I picked up one of my sandwiches, studying its contents.
