What did he need? The storm churning in his gut required more; more space, more freedom, more... violence. Something inside him wanted to explode, to destroy everything around him until there was only ruin. He thought the feeling would have dimmed and disappeared over the last weeks, but instead, it had intensified to the point where he knew he had to act, to channel this energy before it consumed him to the core. “I need to play on my own terms. The more I look at what I accomplished, the less I see its impact. What good have I done? What difference did I make? Medals and honors are just bullshit. I want change and I want it now.”
“We’re making a difference with Purgatory.”
Just the name tore a hole inside him, so much so he wanted to slam his fist in the table again and barely realized he’d done exactly that until the hit reverberated through his arm and shoulder.
“Hello, boys. I see I’ve arrived just in time. Move your ass over, Fergie.” Sloane Friday’s appearance wasn’t a surprise. As a former vice cop and undercover agent, the pink-haired woman had a talent for turning up when least expected, and as she and Lance had become close friends over the years, her popping up wasn’t unexpected, rather an additional annoyance. “Who on earth didn’t finish that piece of pie? Fergie, I should arrest you.”
Sam pushed the unfinished pie and coffee toward Sloane with a mumbled curse. “Damn, woman. One would think you never eat. We were having a serious conversation here.”
Devouring the last of the pastry and downing the leftover coffee, the unusual agent leaned back. “Let me guess, Lance here is still blaming himself for what happened to Bea. Threatening to leave everything behind and turn into a Rambo style Buddhist monk or some similar shit.”
Lance could feel a headache growing and wondered what it would take for them just to shut up and disappear.
“Something like that. Lance has resigned from the Navy and Purgatory.”
When Sloane locked her baby blues with his, Lance felt understanding coming from her, and sadness darkened her face.
Frustrated, Sam sighed. “Hey, Sloane, you’re supposed to say something, like convince him to reconsider, tell him he’s made a bad decision.” As the silence stretched, Sam sighed in disgust. “Don’t tell me he already told you about this fucked-up decision. Leaving everything behind? Bea wouldn’t have wanted that, nor would the Admiral.”
Lance’s soul twisted in agony. “They’re dead. They rode that thin and narrow line, and it wasn’t enough.”
“Bullshit. They changed lives!”
Sloane swept her wild hair to the side. “Yes, ours. Of all the missions, all the victims we helped, her greatest achievement was the opportunity she gave us, Sam. Lance sees it. I see it too. And so should you, especially because of where you came from and who you were.”
Lance sighed at the ongoing low-key acrimony between the two. “It’s not important anymore. I’ve made my decision. End of discussion. Now, leave me alone.”
All fight left Sam and Sloane as they looked at each other before Sloane looked back at him. “What are you going to do?”
Tired of talking, Lance stood to leave, but Sloane touched his hand. No words were exchanged, but it was clear they were far from backing off. Thoughts had circled in his mind for weeks since that fateful event. His perspective had changed, and a decision had been made. However, he didn’t want to drag anybody in his madness. “I’ll be okay.”
Sam snorted, not convinced. “From the look on your face, it’s clear you have a plan, and I want to know what it is. Lance Sorenson always has a plan, and this time is no different. Spill it, for fuck’s sake!”
Lance shook his head. “I’m not bringing you in. You both overcame a lot before you joined Beatrice, and there’s nothing noble in what I intend to do. Carry on with your work, change the world.”
“You’re going rogue.” Sloane’s words said aloud solidified his decision even more.
Sam snarled and shook his head. “Damn, man! You can’t be serious. Going rogue like doing mercenary stuff?? Selling your services to the highest bidder?”
Lance searched for the right words, as it was clear neither of his friends was going to let him go unless he spilled his guts and told them his plan. “I don’t want to work for anyone. I’m through with it. I’ve seen the official obligations of working for the government, and the path you must navigate when working as an organization like Purgatory. I’m tired of it. Nothing moves, the bad guys are still roaming the streets, and we face the same issues over and over again. I can’t stay without doing anything, and I’ve run out of patience for official channels. I’m going to explore less official ones.”
Lance could see the wheels spinning in Sam’s mind before he sucked in a breath and looked at Lance in shock. “A vigilante? That’s your plan?”
“Cut the crap, Sam! Don’t tell me the idea isn’t viable. How many times have your hands been tied because of politics during a mission?” Lance turned his attention to Sloane. “You were a cop for fuck’s sake. You of all people know how improper paperwork allowed scums to walk free. Don’t tell me it’s what you wanted when you wore a badge. I know it’s not what I fucking wanted when I became a SEAL. Fuck politics, fuck paperwork. Why can’t we bring those criminals down, one by one, and protect the innocent? That’s all I ever wanted.”
The silence that descended after his outburst was heavy. The three of them were lost in their thoughts, not that it would change Lance’s mind. The more he analyzed his decision, the more certainty crystallized in his gut.
“I’m in.”
Sloane’s soft voice made Lance whip his head up. His ears rang, and he was sure he’d misheard. “What?”
The former cop angled her head, pink hair framing her face. “Whatever you intend to do, I know it’s for a good cause. I’m in. And don’t say you have to do it on your own. You’re right. I’m tired too. I love Purgatory, and it gave me a purpose for a long time, but something was missing. Purgatory changes things on a global scale, and I want to make more direct changes now.”
Lance opened his mouth to stop her when Sam heaved a dramatic sigh. “And here I thought my criminal days were behind me when Beatrice saved me from jail... Man, I’ve been a thief all my life. It started out of survival, and I know what it is to be a victim, and there’s no way I’m turning down the opportunity to give back.”
“It’s not an opportunity! You aren’t coming with me and destroying what you’ve built. A second chance like Purgatory won’t come again. If I get caught, it will be death or jail. I can’t, no, I won’t ask the same of you. Or allow it.”
Sam arched an eyebrow. “You’re not asking or allowing, and we’re offering. And get real, you won’t last a minute without us. You military people are useless without street smart geniuses like me to watch your back.”
