"Like you care. The Keans’ killing me would solve all your problems."
My head is spinning. What the hell is she talking about? "Part of the deal is that I protect you."
"I can take care of myself."
"Like hell you can. Not against them." The memory of smoke and screams threatens to overwhelm me. "You have no idea what they're capable of."
She looks up at me with those defiant eyes. “At the reception, when you told me this marriage was nothing, you said you wouldn’t hurt me and I could do whatever I wanted.”
I do vaguely remember saying that. But that was when I was lost in my own grief and self-loathing. Hannah is my wife now and I need to look out for her.
“You were either lying or you’ve broken your promise, because all you’ve done since then is hurt me.”
There doesn’t seem to be a limit to the amount of guilt I can feel. “I don’t mean to hurt you.”
"Yes, you do." She steps closer, and the scent of her fills my nose. "Did you really think you could dismiss me? Kiss me, then run away? Touch me, then act like I don't exist and not think it would hurt me?”
She's right. I've been hurting her since the moment we met. The guilt burns in my gut, mixing with the primal need to keep her safe.
I run my fingers through my hair wishing I could make this right but not knowing how.
“And now you're telling me I can't even see my friends?"
"That's different. The Keans?—"
"Are the perfect excuse, aren't they? For everything. For forcing me to marry a man who can’t stand me. For treating me like I'm nothing."
"You're not nothing." I want to grab her and give her a shake. She’s so wrong. Not about the hurting because yes, I’ve hurt her. But not because she’s nothing. It’s because she has a pull on me that I can’t handle.
"Then what am I? Because right now, I feel like I'm just a convenience. A way to get what you want from my family."
My chest constricts. That's exactly what this marriage was supposed to be. A business arrangement. So why is her pain tearing me apart?
"Hannah—"
"No." She holds up her hand. "I understand the situation. Truly, I do. But I’m not just a device in your and my father’sscheme to take down the Keans. I’m a person, not a doll to put on a shelf and pull out whenever you need a wife.”
“It’s not that. This is about keeping you safe.” My fists clench at my sides. "The Keans killed my parents. They murdered—" I catch myself, not ready to talk about Meghan to the woman who is tempting me to betray her. "They destroy everything they touch. And right now, you're a perfect target."
"I'm meeting my friends at a public coffee shop, not walking into enemy territory."
"Every step outside this room is enemy territory." I reach out, planning to hold her arms, but she steps back. "Please. Just… stay here. Where I can protect you."
“Uh-huh. What if the Keans had shown up last night while you were out with your mistress? You wouldn’t have been here to protect me then.”
Mistress?"About last night…" I shift, not wanting to discuss last night but feeling like I owe it to her. Especially since she thinks I left to go fuck someone else. “Do you want to talk about what happened?”
"I think I got the gist of it." Hannah's voice is flat. "You made it clear that all you want is a wife on paper to make my father happy. I finally get it, Ash. You don’t want me in any form or fashion.”
The defeat in her voice rips my insides apart. She thinks I rejected her because I don't want her? Christ. If only she knew how wrong she is. How I woke up this morning hard and aching from the lack of fulfillment her body had promised. How even now, watching her bite her lower lip, it takes every ounce of self-control not to grab her and show her exactly how much I want her.
But I can't. The ghost of Meghan stands between us.
"That's not…" How do I explain that it's wanting her that is the problem? I can see that confession only hurting her more.
But Hannah's already turning away, her shoulders rigid. "It's fine. Message received. But don’t pretend that you’re worried about my protection. If you were, you wouldn’t have left me alone last night.”
“There are guards?—”
