Okay.Everything all right?
She responded and hit send. Then she walked out of the bathroom and straight to the window in her front bedroom to glance across at Ava’s. Leo was just getting out of his truck. He glanced at her house, took a step, then stopped.
Her heart squeezed. That wasn’t good. It was as if he was afraid to come over. But why?
She glanced at her phone. No response yet. Careful to stay out of view, she stood there watching as indecision rooted him to his grandmother’s driveway. She thought briefly about texting him again, but what would she say? What could she say? It wasn’t like she was going to bring up the baby tonight. Hell no. Not if he was already wrestling with something.
A second later, he straightened his shoulders and started to cross the street toward her house. She let out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding and rushed out into the hallway. “Fi, Leo’s on his way over. Could you do me a favor and stay up here? Something’s up, but I don’t know if I can get him to tell me. He isn’t staying long. He has to go back to Joyful.”
“Okay,” Fi said. “No baby talk?”
She shook her head. “No. Not tonight.” Then she turned and headed downstairs as the doorbell echoed through the house.
That was going to be a tricky subject. One she wasn’t even ready to broach. Besides, all she’d done was pee on a stick. Three of them. Maybe it was better to see a doctor first and get professional confirmation before upsetting the apple cart.
Feeling a little better, she put a smile on her face and opened the door.
Chapter Eighteen
For the past hour, Leo wrestled with the question of whether to see Kaydee or not when he came up here to his grandmother’s. And once he arrived he fought against his urge to flee. The damn reflex was ingrained in him, deeper, stronger than he’d realized. He thought he’d buried it, along with his drinking and his demons, but the second shit started to fall apart at work today, it resurfaced.
But his feelings for Kaydee were stronger and won out.
For how long?
Before he could form an answer, her door opened, and she was standing in front of him, looking happy and beautiful…and anxious.
God, he hated that he was the dark to her light.
It was her light that reached him, and he felt as if everything inside him took a breath. A deep one.
“Hi.” Color rose into her face, and damn, he didn’t think he’d ever get tired of watching it happen.
“Hey,” he said, then, because he needed to touch her—needed their connection more than air—he stepped right up to her and pulled her in for kiss.
With a sigh, she opened up for him and pressed close. There she went with her unequivocal, unquestioning acceptance again. She didn’t stop him. Didn’t ask questions. Just gave and gave.
And God, he needed that right now. Needed to feel wanted. Needed her.
But was it really fair to Kaydee?
That damn question again. All day it’d reverberated in his head like a broken record. From the start, he knew she was too good for him. It was the reason he hadn’t acted on his attraction to her for so long. She deserved the best in life.
Dammit. He wanted to be that for her. He just wasn’t sure if he was.
With another sigh, she broke the kiss to press small ones along his jaw, half on, half off his lips. God, she was sweet. So damn sweet. He ran his hands up and down her back, closing his eyes as he let that sweetness wash over him, almost making him whole.
Almost.
Hewas in his own way.
How could he possibly tell her he loved her and mean it if he chose to be selfish and put himself first instead of thinking about what was best for her? Was he really the best choice for her? Someone tainted and damaged? Someone who attracted trouble without effort?
Did he really want to wait around until he soured her carefree ways?
No. He didn’t want that to happen, and yet he didn’t want to leave her, either. Christ. Wasn’t there an option that kept her unhurt and in his life? That was the option he wanted.
God…he wanted it bad.
