With Danny, the conflicting emotions intensified. As I helped him into the shower, the warmth of the water was a stark contrast to the icy grip of fear constricting my heart. Torment’s words echoed in my head:you need help. But more pressing was the growing feeling that I didn’t deserve help. That I didn’t deserve Danny’s gentle trust, his quiet acceptance.
He stood there, silent and stoic, and the sight of him, so broken yet still somehow strong, ignited a fierce, selfish protectiveness. A protectiveness born not out of love, but out of guilt, a desperate need to atone for the darkness I’d embraced. It felt like a thin, fragile shield against the crushing weight of my own actions.
Washing him, the simple act of caring, felt like a performance. Almost a desperate attempt to convince myself, and perhaps him, that I wasn’t entirely lost. A pathetic attempt to redeem myself.
After the shower, I wrapped him in a towel, my own hands trembling. The relief I felt when he closed his eyes, exhausted, was immediate but short-lived. Torment’s words, the calls he had to make, slammed back into me.
The thought of facing Montana, of explaining... of admitting my failings... felt like a slow, agonizing death, a self-inflicted wound that I desperately, selfishly wanted to avoid. But I knew I couldn’t. The weight of my choices, of my failures, bore down on me.
And this time, there was no escape.
Whispered muffles disturbed my sleep. I opened my eyes to see Dr. Robinette, Torment, and Malice locked in a tense argument. The words “Diamond Creek,” “Gunner,” and “Dr. Walker” pierced the haze of my sleep, jolting me fully awake.
My stomach clenched.
Diamond Creek. Ellery and Jessica were there. A wave of relief washed over me, quickly followed by a chilling dread. Could I really involve them? Danny’s safety was paramount, but dragging our friends into this... it felt like a betrayal of their trust, a reckless gamble with their lives.
“I found Dr. Walker. She’s in Diamond Creek, Nebraska,” Dr. Robinette said, her voice deceptively reluctant.
Torment and Malice groaned, their displeasure palpable.
I knew the area intimately. Danny and I spent some time there. The thought of seeing Ellery and Jessica again, their welcoming faces swimming in my mind’s eye, fueled my desperation. I needed help, and I knew they wouldn’t deny me. I knew it. But my quiet certainty cracked under the weight of my own self-doubt. Was I being selfish? Was that the right decision? My loyalty to Danny warred with my concern for my friends.
“Great,” Torment snarled. “That’s Silver Shadows territory.”
“Gonna need Fury, Mercy, or Montana to call King and let him know,” Malice added, his voice grim.
The pit in my stomach deepened. Dr. Robinette’s next words were a gut punch.
“Dr. Walker... she’s been claimed by one of the brothers.”
“Shit,” Malice cursed. “Which one?”
“Gunner.”
The name hit me like a physical blow. Gunner. The imposing figure from the Silver Shadows’ clubhouse. Dangerous, yes, but also surprisingly understanding. He’d listened when others hadn’t. But his woman... that changed everything. I could almost feel the weight of his disapproval, the simmering fury that would erupt if he learned she was even remotely connected to us.
My blood ran cold. I knew in that moment I had made a mistake even considering involving Ellery and Jessica. I couldn’t do that to them. I wouldn’t.
Malice shook his head. “Great. He’s the Sergeant at Arms for the club and a big motherfucker. A dominant. He won’t let his woman anywhere near Sypher or our Intern.”
Malice’s words were a condemnation of my already fractured plan.
Val’s smirk felt like a cruel mockery of my inner turmoil. “She already agreed to meet them. But not in Diamond Creek. Albin, Wyoming. A small town, thirty minutes from the border. She’s willing to drive to meet them in a safe environment. What did Montana say?”
Torment’s smirk was devoid of humor. “Yeah, about that. Couldn’t reach him. Talked to Reaper. Shit hit the fan in Oklahoma. Montana confronted Kansas... Let’s just say the Stone temper reared its ugly head. Both idiots are in jail. Reaper’s trying to do damage control, and Mercy’s flown out to stop Montana from killing Kansas.”
Dr. Robinette’s voice was flat, devoid of hope. “So, we’re on our own, then?”
“Looks that way.” Torment sighed.
Sitting up on the bed, I rubbed my forehead as Danny still slept next to me, his pained face a cruel mockery of the turmoil raging inside me. “Danny needs help,” I admitted. “I don’t care where we go or who we have to see. If that means taking him to see Dr. Walker, then so be it.” The lie unresolved, unspoken but palpable.
Going back meant involving friends I knew Danny wanted to protect.
“I’ll do my best to control the fallout,” I whispered, the words a desperate prayer rather than a confident assertion. Because I knew, with a sickening certainty, that I wouldn’t be able to control shit. The second Ellery or Jessica learned we were in the area, they wouldn’t stop until they got to us. Gunner, my God, Gunner... the thought of his fury felt like a physical blow. He’d kill me himself before letting anyone else touch me for involving his woman. And he would have every right, damn it. That’s not to mention what Ellery’s husband, Ryder, would do when he learned his pregnant wife was involved.
But I didn’t see any other way.
