“Being held?” The question carried through him.
Tiiran closed his eyes. No one was there to see and Orin wouldn’t mind. “Being held by you.” It was as if the blanket of Orin’s approval was around him, except the blanket was Orin. Which didn’t make sense but Tiiran didn’t seem to care. He’d thought this would be like the hug, or it would start that way and then turn into something more of what an assistant would normally do on the lap of an outguard.
Orin probably wouldn’t mind Tiiran’s amorous attentions if Tiiran attempted them, but Orin had received plenty of those from librarians already, and Tiiran didn’t want what they had to become only another library game.
And he didn’t want to disappoint Orin. He never wanted to do that. Which he surely would if he tried to be seductive. Tiiran had no business trying to seduce anyone. Orin was generous to give himthis.
“I worry all the time when you’re gone.” Tiiran opened his eyes in alarm at the words from his own mouth, but Orin tightened his hold again, pinning Tiiran to him. He was big and strong and Tiiran breathed in and then said, “Tighter,” and Orin held him so tightly that all the nerves seem to leave Tiiran when he exhaled. He fell against Orin and closed his eyes. “I worry all the time for you. I try not to think about it, but then your friends come in and….” He tensed. Above him, Orin sighed faintly. “This is strange, isn’t it? We’re friends, but this is strange. Because of me.”
Many people played games where they had to obey and it didn’t always mean bed sport. Nikoly had said so. Tiiran just… had to be told things most others didn’t, but it pleased Orin, and that made Tiiran feel better in return, so it had to be enough.
Which meant, of course, that if he wanted to do something similar with Nikoly, and Nikoly was not only teasing him, then he could. And yet, that could not be true. It didn’t feel true.
“Now you’re breathing fast again, just when I had you calm,” Orin murmured above his ear, raising goosebumps all over Tiiran’s skin.
“No.” Tiiran opened his eyes, then inched up from how he’d slouched into Orin’s chest. Orin let him, although he didn’t let go. “First, you tell me what happened. That’s more important.”
“Hmm.” Orin expressed his doubt in the same warm manner that he did anything. “I mentioned accidents to you, did I not? And how outguards sometimes end up victims of them?” Tiiran tensed, but nodded. “This part you will not share with anyone. Agree.”
“I won’t share it with anyone,” Tiiran replied, impatient to hear the rest.
Orin squeezed him a little, then relaxed again. “I could not say for certain that some noble families have begun plotting against our current ruler for their own chance at the throne, but they are watchful of the information released to us. Perhaps they don’t have eyes-and-ears in the palace, and so don’t realize Piya has forgotten the Outguard and the Great Library are at the ruler’s disposal. Or perhaps Piya doesn’t have eyes-and-ears focused on anything but rumors within the palace. Either way, outguards are being robbed on the roads, which in better times would not happen. So, you will no longer see outguards returning to the palace alone.”
“Orin.” Tiiran dug his fingers into the back of Orin’s arm, which Orin probably didn’t feel through his sleeve. “Did you have an accident?”
“No. I am—and you’re not to fret over this, Tiiran—no longer gathering information on official assignment for the Outguard. I have been traveling outside the capital to help escort pairs of outguards on the final leg of their journeys to hand in their reports. As a precaution.”
“Precaution!” Tiiran wriggled and Orin allowed him to turn around to glare accusingly into his face. “You were wounded!”
“Amateurs.” Orin had bullshit ideas of what might be reassuring. “Bumbling lackeys. Not even sworn or hired guards. They probably either didn’t want to really risk injuring outguards and earning the king’s displeasure—if he would care—or didn’t realize weareactually trained to fight as other guards are. Tiiran,” he whispered over Tiiran’s ear, “Tiiran, listen. The word has already gone out. No outguard will be alone now, and anyone nearing the capital will have extra protection. Not just me. There have been rumors,” he paused again and though they were pressed close, lowered his voice even more when he spoke again, “you must keep this to yourself. I tell you only to protect you. There are rumors that Piya has taken action of some kind. Certain figures from the palace and capital have gone silent. Perhaps forced to flee, perhaps taken, we don’t know. It wouldn’t be our concern except…”
“If Piya frightens the nobles, they will act too, and do something rash,” Tiiran finished for him. “I see.”
“But so far, Piya seems unaware of the Great Library, or those of us in the guards. Not even as tools to use.” Orin reached up to run the back of his hand down the side of Tiiran’s neck and hummed when Tiiran shivered. “So let’s keep it that way. We will protect ourselves. You keep the assistants focused on their work and try to control your temper. And I will guide my friends home.”
“And protect yourself?” Tiiran demanded as if there was no tremble in his voice.
“Ah.” Orin sighed it. “The first thing I wanted after getting them here safely was to see you. I’d not risk your temper for anything.”
“Hmph.” Tiiran raised his chin, which Orin seemed to take as a request for him to pet Tiiran’s neck again. Tiiran’s lips parted as he shuddered. He was going to make a fool of himself if he did not move soon. “You aren’t afraid of my temper.”
“Not in the way others are.” Orin petted him carefully. Tiiran was not a cat, but it did feel nice. “Your temper means you’re anxious about something. And you seem especially in an uproar today.” Tiiran froze. Orin pressed on, gentle but relentless. “You were flushed before you approached me. Care to tell me about it now? Or should I ask the handsome fellow at the tables who could not take his eyes off you?”
Tiiran scrambled off Orin’s lap in less than a heartbeat, more surprised that he didn’t fall than at how easily Orin released him. He spun around to glare, then couldn’t manage more than a quick frown before looking away. If he wanted Orin to help soothe the tangle inside him, he shouldn’t complain when Orin did exactly that.
But hewantedto complain.
Only to wonder,reallywonder, what Orin would do if he did. If he would treat Tiiran as he treated his others, and if Tiiran would beg for more too, as they must.
“All right,” he agreed finally. “There’s something I don’t understand. Several things,” he added a moment later. “But one thing right now that I cannot make make sense. And,” he paused to grumble and then growl, faintly, “it’s frustrating.” He had a suspicion before he finally he returned his gaze to Orin and his suspicion was confirmed. “Why are you smiling now?”
It was the fond one. It usually meant Tiiran had done something right, although Tiiran never knew what that was.
“You’ll get mad if I say,” Orin answered mildly.
“I’ll get mad if you don’t,” Tiiran replied in turn, crossing his arms.
Orin bowed his head to allow that Tiiran was right. “I know you don’t like them, but what a gift the fae gave me when they brought you to me.”
