It was how he imagined Cal felt all the time.
Ray flipped the book open.
“Honestly.” Cal dropped down next to him, his tone lightly scolding. “Can’t leave you alone for a second or you start working.”
Ray lifted his gaze from the book, wondering what Cal had been humming on his way over here but not going to ask.
“I’m relaxed,” he insisted, noting that, despite the chill, Cal had removed his coat and tied it around his waist. Probably to absorb the sun like a cat. But he would get more freckles, and of that, Ray approved. He raised his eyes to Cal’s face, who seemed pleased at the ogling. “I am,” Ray tried again. “I am in the moment.”
Cal’s incredulous expression told Ray very clearly that Ray had not shared that that particular phrase with Cal before. Cal opened his mouth, closed it to obviously consider his response, then asked, “Did a counselor tell you to do that? You know what, never mind. That’s not my business, is it? It’s between you and them, and you arein the moment.” His lips did quirk, but he said it seriously enough. He smelled of ferns and the damp earth around coastal redwoods. “Here,” he added, smiling, “for your moment.”
He pulled a single stem from the posy of blue wildflowers clutched in one hand and then leaned in to slide the bundle behind Ray’s ear.
“You aren’t supposed to pick those,” Ray remarked, bending his head to let Cal fuss with the placement. The flowers, or flower, was several blooms coming from one stem, making it a little large and unwieldy. Ray could see blue from the corner of his eye. “I don’t know what these are.”
“True, but I only picked two, and I will bring back some seeds to replace them.” Cal stuck the other one carelessly behind his own ear so he could better arrange Ray’s. “It’s larkspur, but a wild variety, so I have no idea if the meanings attached to cultivated larkspur apply. Butwildandprettyapplied more, to my way of thinking, and they’re blue. It will do until I can raid our yard and my dad’s yard this summer and make you a proper crown. Or buy one, but flowers are so expensive.”
“Is your dad keeping the house?” Ray asked. The larkspur was not moving, but Cal kept touching Ray anyway, petting his hair and brushing his cheek.
That question stopped him though. “Why? Did he say he was?” Cal focused sharply on Ray. “Whatever is going on with them, no one will tell me anything. Is he moving? Did he talk to you?Of course,he’d talk to you first and not me. These look stunning with your eyes, but you know, I do think morning glories would be lovely. A softer color, with the green in the crown. I wish their meanings were happier. Calvin Parker communicates just fine when he wants to. So they don’t want me to know what they’re up to. That must be it.”
“Callalily.” Ray stopped him there for his own good. “Are you hungry?” Cal had kept his shoes and socks on, at least. But, under the trees while he’d restlessly poked around, he still must have been freezing. Ray put a hand to Cal’s shoulder and narrowed his eyes at the chill in Cal’s skin. “When we go on our walk later, you should wear your coat.”
“By then, the sun will be out and it will be warmer,” Cal returned brightly. More sun was what they were waiting for. Ray was glad he’d insisted on that, now that he’d remembered Cal’s reaction to the cold, damp forest floor.
“Wear it anyway.” Ray growled for show, and Cal laughed as he turned around to root through the bag. He pulled out a bag of chocolate chips, granola, and dried cherries that was his homemade trail mix and sighed as if theslightlyhealthier than outright candy snacking option was a burden, when he was the one who had prepared it and also he had no hesitation in gobbling it down.
He put a bottle of juice next to Ray, and a little spiced meat stick that Ray thought cost too much for what it was, but at least wasn’t sugar. Then he turned to his own bag to pull out paper files and two ballpoint pens. He couldn’t use the nicer kind of pens; he lost them too many times to spend the money.
Months later, and he still thought Ray needed to eat more to keep his strength up. It was one meat stick and a bottle of juice, which wouldn’t do much. But Ray didn’t mind reassuring him by accepting them and finishing them off while Cal nibbled cherries and chocolate and flipped through papers.
Ray tucked the empty packages against the trunk on one side of him so they wouldn’t roll or fly away, and when he turned back, Cal was watching him.
“You still in the moment?” Cal asked.
Ray couldn’t determine what, if anything, he was really asking.
“A different moment,” Ray answered and sat up to pin down one of Cal’s papers before it could fly away.
Cal dropped the mostly empty bag of his snack onto the pile to hold it all down, then scooted closer to Ray before crossing his legs to get comfortable. The way he regarded Ray was warm and serious. Ray watched him in return, until a shiver went through Cal’s wings.
Fussing over Ray was one of his favorite things, Cal claimed. Ray was inclined to believe him and not just because fairies told the truth.
“You are supposed to be relaxing,” Cal reminded him, voice a little husky. “I will give you a choice, your phone or your book.”
“You get both,” Ray reminded him, gesturing to Cal’s already growing pile of things to do and look at and read.
Cal shook his head as if Ray was being silly. “I’m fairy.”
Ray wrinkled his nose but wasn’t going to argue. Cal needed distractions and work. Ray needed work and wanted distractions. “Book,” he sighed at last.
Cal’s expression said he didn’t know what to make of that. But he pulled an individually wrapped piece of cheese from the bag and handed that to Ray as well, possibly as a reward or some kind of positive reinforcement. Ray took it anyway, and sat back against the tree before he ate it.
He patted the ground next to him, staring down at the introduction to his light reading. “At least be warmer over here.”
“Next to Ray the furnace.” It wasn’t a grumble. Cal awkwardly scooted over some more instead of just getting up, and then curled up at Ray’s side, dropping his phone into Ray’s lap and handing Ray a stack of papers for some reason.
Ray slipped them beneath his book to hold them down. Cal didn’t notice, already immersed in his work.
