“Well then, tell me about him,” Grace says, pulling me from my thoughts.
That nagging feeling inside of me is telling me to tell her the truth, but I push it down. I think the fact that I had zero hesitance to lie to her means I’m not ready for her to pop this bubble I’m living in.
Not yet.
“He’s great. He’s a year older than me. He treats me well, and I really like him.”
Grace raises a brow. “That’s cool, but are you going to tell me his name?”
“I would rather not. Not right now at least.”
“Cora, is there a reason you’re hiding who you’re seeing?” Grace asks, frowning.
“I just want to keep it on the down-low for now and keep it to myself. I want to make sure that this is actually happening before I scream it from the rooftops. Besides, the less I tell you, the less you can report back to my brother.”
“Cora, whatever you say to me in confidence is just between us.” She is so sincere it hurts.
I know she means it too. She would keep it from Clay if I asked her to, but it’s not fair for me to ask her to do that.
“I know, but still. I’m not sure Clay will approve, and I don’t want you to get caught in the middle of Clay and me.”
A crease forms between her eyebrows. “Why wouldn’t Clay approve? I won’t lie, Cora, this isn’t giving me the warm fuzzies.”
I run a hand through my hair. “I’m messing this all up and not explaining it well, but I promise it’s nothing bad. Honestly, the guy doesn’t have the greatest reputation, and I know Clay wouldn’t be a fan.”
“First off, I don’t care what the guy’s reputation is. Second, your brother has no room to talk. When we met, everyone thought he was a manwhore who slept with every woman at the drop of a hat when it couldn’t be further from the truth. We both know that reputations don’t mean shit. Sometimes people’s perceptions are off, and it takes really getting to know them to understand that.”
“I know,” I say softly as I spin my drink on the table.
“If he means something to you, I know the guys and I will give him a chance. We won’t judge him for his past actions or what others say about him. The past is the past, and if your brother can’t get on board with it, then oh well. It’s your life.”
“I know you will. See, he was kind of in a relationship last year, and he’s left a little jaded from it. I just want to make sure it all works before I introduce him to everyone, you know?”
Understanding crosses Grace’s face. “You’re trying to protect your heart.”
“You could say that, yeah.”
Grace looks over my shoulder. While she’s lost in thought, I take a drink, trying to calm my nerves. I should just tell her that it’s Kellan. I know I should. The sooner they find out, the better, but I can’t. I can’t get my mouth to form the words.
It’s because you don’t want to see the look of hurt and betrayal on her face.
“You know, as long as I’ve known you, you’ve always been fearless. You’ve gone after what you want, guns blazing, giving zero fucks about the outcome. You don’t care what anyone thinks, and I admire that about you. Hell, I wish I could be like you sometimes.”
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome, but back to the point. I think you should give this guy a chance. If he breaks your heart, he breaks it. We will help you pick up the pieces. If you think he’s worth it, dive in. It’s okay to be scared, Cora. Sometimes we think the storm will be way worse than it actually is. I don’t want you to miss out on the possibility of happiness because you were too afraid.” I open my mouth to say something, but she holds up her hand, cutting me off. “Let me finish. As badly as I want you to jump in, I need you to watch your back. Red flags are very real, and you need to watch out for them. Trust your gut, and if it’s telling you something’s wrong, you need to jump ship. Just don’t assume something based on his reputation, let him prove himself to you. Okay?”
“Okay,” I say softly.
My heart is filled with gratitude for Grace. She has no idea that she just gave me permission to fall head over heels for her best friend, but she did. Somehow, she managed to turn my hesitancy into acceptance that he and I are happening.
I’ll go on one more date with Kellan, and if it’s as good as the last one, then I’ll tell her and Clay who it is I’m seeing.
Just one more date.
* * *
Coach blows his whistle. “Again!”
