My second leg from San Francisco wasn’t much better. This time, I got a Chatty Cathy next to me. All I wanted to do was sleep, but she kept nudging me before going off on some tangent.
Needless to say, when I finally made it home, I crashed. Between the party Saturday and the over twenty-four-hour flights, I was exhausted.
That didn’t stop me from missing the guys though.
It’s been a week since I’ve been home and I already hate it. I’m back to work now, picking up extra shifts to make up for the ones I’ve missed. School has been more boring than normal as well.
It’s like my life has lost all its color now that I’m not with them. When did that happen?
The guys have been great though. They call me every day individually and then as a group. It’s like I’m there with them.
I won’t get to talk to them much today though. They finished their cleanup with Australia and are heading back to London to set up for the San Juan party. I’ve of course been invited, but I need to finish out school first.
Only a little over a month left. Ezra has been hounding me about spending the summer with them. Usually I’d take a class to get ahead, but it’s tempting to ditch my responsibilities and head out on the road with them. There’s a little over a month left until the San Juan party. It’s two weeks after my last class.
Then the Vegas party will be in early August, rounding out with the London party in October.
It will be great to go to the Vegas and San Juan parties, but I’m not sure about London. I want to go, but can I really take more time off school?
The responsible side of me says no. I need to focus and finish out my last year.
The side that is so hopeful I’ve found my family begs me to say yes. To go gallivanting the world with the men who make me happy.
I hate being in this position.
“What are you thinking about so hard?” Holland asks, coming into the kitchen.
“Life. It’s so damn hard.”
She laughs. “If it wasn’t hard, it wouldn’t be worth it. Wouldn’t you get bored if everything came so easily to you? You wouldn’t appreciate anything because you didn’t have to work for it.”
I scoff. “I didn’t ask for a philosophy lesson, dork. I’m just sad that I can’t be with the guys right now. Real world responsibilities and all.”
She comes over to where I’m sitting, taking the seat next to me.
“You really like them, huh?”
I nod. “They have all been so great. Even Ezra. He’s not the same guy that he was a few months ago. There’s this softer side to him. I know he doesn’t show it to many people. It makes me feel special.”
She leans over, poking me in the ribs. “That’s because you are special. You’re one of a kind. I’m glad they are seeing it. How is it with the sharing thing?”
I shrug. “It’s not bad. Sometimes one of the guys will steal me away because he wants me on my own, but most of the time I’m with more than one of them. They always make sure I’m their main focus. It’s nice.”
“Even with Drake and Liam? Aren’t they a couple or something?”
“Not that they have made it public, but yes. You were right about them. They are close. Still, it doesn’t feel weird when I’m with them. It feels like there is a place for me too.”
“Sounds like you have it made. What are you still doing here? I hope you’re not staying for me.” She frowns.
“I mean, you are part of the reason. We haven’t spent much time apart. Plus, I have bills here to pay. Then there’s the little issue of school. I feel like the world is stacked against me.” I drop my head into my hands as I whine.
“Let yourself have this little pity party. I’ll give you a couple of minutes. Then you are going to pick your head back up and solve your issues. You are the strongest, smartest woman I’ve ever known. You can figure this out. If you want them, go get them.”
I sigh. “What about everyone else? I didn’t really think much about them, but when we did that live in Australia, some guy mentioned that I must be getting gangbanged all the time. It really bothered me.”
Her eyes widen. “Wait. You’re getting gangbanged? I need all the details.”
I shake my head, laughing. “You know I’m not. Not yet at least,” I tease, winking at her. “My point is that we are all very public. Can I handle the backlash from this?”
