“As good as can be expected, I suppose. I should be asking you that though. You took two bullets.”
“I’m sore. I’ll be okay though. You got hit in the face.” He reaches and cups my face. I can still feel some pain, but it’s dull.
“I’m fine, Lo.” I stare up at him as he examines my face.
He nods; then he leans down and kisses my lips.
“Lo,” I whisper.
“What is it?” I close my eyes as he holds his forehead to mine. “What are we doing?”
“Isn’t it obvious? We’re kissing.”
“No. I mean what are we doing? A couple of weeks ago you fucked another woman. Just last night, you told me you couldn’t be with me. What’s changed?”
He leans back and looks at the ceiling again. “Everything. I almost lost you, Mia. I couldn’t live with myself if I had lost you and you didn’t know how I really feel about you.”
“How do you feel?”
He sits up and leans against the headboard. I sit cross-legged in front of him.
“I’m scared, Mia. I care about you so much, but I wasn’t wrong. I’m a bad man. I just don’t think I can stay away anymore. You’ve been driving me crazy. “
I smile. “You drive me crazy too, Lo.”
“I didn’t sleep with the waitress.”
“Oh, Scarlett?”
He chuckles. “I don’t even know if that’s really her name. I made it up. After you left, she threatened you, and I slammed her against the wall. You make me feel out of control.”
“You do the same for me, Lo. I don’t feel like I can think straight around you. I don’t care though. I want to be with you.”
He shakes his head. “I have a bad past. I can’t tell you all about it. I won’t. Will you be able to live with the fact that there are parts about my life I’m unwilling to tell you about?”
“I can. There are things about my past I would rather not relive as well.”
“I never cared about my past before you. You make me ashamed of it. I’m ashamed that I wasn’t better for you.”
“You didn’t even know me, Lo. How could you have been better for someone you didn’t even know existed?”
“You’re right, but it doesn’t change it. I’m scared I’m too set in my ways. What if I can’t be a better man for you?”
I reach out and take his hand. “If you don’t like your story, Lo, then change it. Only you can make a change. You’re the author of your own story. While we cannot rewrite our pasts, we can write our future.Ourfuture, Lo. Together.”
“I don’t deserve you,mio piccolo angelo.” He pulls me into his side and kisses the top of my head.
“Maybe you don’t, Lo, but it doesn’t matter. You know why?”
“Why?”
“Because I deserve you.”
∞∞∞
Lorenzo
Hearing her say those words makes my heart beat faster. I knew she cared about me, but I didn’t know she really felt so strongly. When she speaks, I can almost see what she’s saying. I can feel her belief in it. Fuck if I don’t want to believe it myself.
