I tut, shaking my head. “Wrong thing to ask, Chris. Always assume I don’t know where anything is.”
He turns to face me, blinking. “How did you survive without me?”
“Madi did everything around here,” I say with a shrug. “But she had to move in with her boyfriend, and leave me to fend for myself.” I exaggerate a sigh. “I’m not built to be alone, Chris.”
He laughs as he turns around to face me, and pulls me into his embrace. “No, you’re really not.”
I was half kidding when I said I wasn’t built to be alone, but in this moment, pressed against him, it feels like I’m breathing again. Truth is, I despise being alone. The silence, the empty space—it suffocates me. I crave noise, music, and the presence of others.
A shaky breath escapes my lips as I squeeze him close, my chest aching. “I really did miss you,” I whisper against his hoodie, my voice barely audible over the thumping of my heart. Idon’t think I’ll be able to bear it when he eventually has to leave again.
“Me too,” he murmurs, pressing a light kiss to my hair. “Most people in London like to go to sleep early.”
I blink away the tears that threaten to spill, a laugh bubbling out of me. I pull back to look up at him. “You mean, they’re normal and don’t like to stay awake until five in the morning?”
Chris scoffs, a smile playing on his lips as he wipes his thumb over my cheek. “I’d much rather be weird with you than normal with anyone else.”
God, my heart feels like it’s being torn. I love him so much. More than words can express. More than I can understand. More than he’ll ever understand.
“Fair warning,” I say, reluctantly pulling away from him. “I don’t know if you remember, but I’m not exactly the best when it comes to baking, or cooking, or anything involving a stove.” The urge to return to his arms is overwhelming, but it’s a dangerous place to be. It stirs up emotions I shouldn’t entertain, clouding my thoughts. I rarely think clearly, but with Chris, it’s crucial.
“I remember,” he chuckles, running a hand through his hair. “So, that hasn’t changed in four years?”
Four years.It always catches me off guard how long it’s been. It feels like it was just yesterday that we were in my parents kitchen. “I think I’ve regressed,” I admit, scrunching my nose.
He chuckles. “How is that even possible? You almost burned down your house at one point.”
Yeah. That was a fun night. We were high, and wanted to make brownies, which wasn’t the best combination mixing weed and ovens, especially when it comes to me. But the point is, no one died, so… I consider that a win in my books.
“Madi cooked when she lived here, and when she didn’t, we had takeout.” I hold my hands up. “I don’t attempt things I know I suck at.”
He shoots me a look. “You could never suck at anything.”
“Well…” I tease with a smirk.
Chris scoffs, shaking his head as he turns around to grab some more ingredients. Watching him move around my kitchen feels surreal. It’s like we’ve stepped back in time, and for a moment, everything feels right again. He pulls out the flour and eggs, placing them on the counter.
“Found them,” he announces, casting a quick glance in my direction. “Can I trust you to crack eggs?”
I push off the island, sidling up beside Chris. “Sure,” I say with a shrug. “When has a little shell ever hurt anyone?” I tease, flashing him a playful grin.
His brow raises, and he chuckles. “I’ll tell you what.” He cracks two eggs into the bowl, shooting me a sideways glance. “Why don’t you just sit down, and I’ll take care of this.”
I shoot him a grateful grin. “That’s why I love you.”
I watch Chris expertly add ingredients to the bowl, memories flooding my mind. I’ve said those three words to him before. So many times I can’t even count. I think of all the times I didn’t mean it like I do now. How those three little words held a completely different meaning back then.
He lets out a soft laugh, his eyes meeting mine. “Yeah.”
And how he’ll never know how different those three little words mean to me now.
Chapter 7
Nothing has changed
Gabi flops onto the couch with a sigh, wearing the biggest smile I’ve ever seen. “Those were, without a doubt, the best pancakes you’ve ever made.” Her smile is even brighter than when I surprised her yesterday.
Seeing her smile has always been my favorite sight in the world, and that hasn’t changed. I’ve witnessed so many versions of her. Laughing, crying, bawling in my arms with blood trickling down her. Every time she smiles, my heart blips a little at seeing her happiness. But then again, it might just beherthathas this effect on me. Even a half-second glance from her can make my heart flip over in my chest.
