I don’t respond. I squeeze my eyes shut, feeling my lip tremble as tears spill out of me. I don’t want anyone here. All I want is Grayson. But I can’t have that.
She sighs and stands up. “C’mon. You’ve stayed in bed all week. I think it’s time to get up and move on.”
I roll my eyes and pull the sheets down, looking up at her. “I don’t want to move on.”
She frowns a little and shakes her head. “Rosie, you can’t stay depressed forever.”
“I’m not depressed,” I tell her. “I’m just sad. I’m allowed to be sad.”
She nods and then scoots closer beside me. “What happened with Grayson?” she asks.
That day after Grayson broke my heart, I came upstairs and buried myself in the sheets, still smelling his body wash, and cried myself to sleep. And when the girls came over, they found me in bed crying and asked what had happened. I didn’t tell them. I just told everyone to leave and let me cry it out.
I don’t know how much longer I’ll feel like this. Leila might be right. It may be time to move on. Ever since I started this with Grayson, I knew how it would end. I just never expected to fall for him and have him tell me he feels nothing for me at all.
Am I stupid? Because I saw how he looked at me, how he smiled at me and took care of me, and I’m supposed to believe that meant nothing?
“Maybe I should rethink Paris.”
She narrows her eyes at me. “Is this you wanting the job offer, or you trying to run away?”
I sigh, tipping my head back. “I told him I loved him,” I whisper. Of course, I want to run away. How can I stay here and see him around campus?
“You told him?” she asks. I nod, squeezing my eyes shut. “And what did he say?”
“That he doesn’t feel the same. That he feels nothing for me at all,” I say, my voice breaking.
“That’s bullshit,” she says. “There’s no way he feels nothing for you, Rosie. He called me, angry as hell, telling me that you could have died. He said, ‘what were you thinking giving her drugs? That was so stupid of you. If you were really her friend, you wouldn’t have done that.’”
“He said that?”
She nods, her face dropping as a frown forms on her face. “I’m so sorry, Rosie. I would never have thought that would happen.” She swallows. “I don’t have much experience with weed. I just thought edibles would be easier for you. I should have written a note or something.”
I shake my head. I don’t want her to blame herself. “It’s not your fault. You texted me.”
“Yeah, and that wasn’t enough. I should have known your phone would have died or—”
“You couldn’t have known that,” I say. “I don’t blame you, and you shouldn’t blame yourself.”
“I do,” she says, her eyes welling up. “I honestly can’t apologize enough.”
I reach out from under the covers and squeeze her hand. “I love you, Leila. You did nothing wrong. You helped me with something I asked for. It’s not on you, plus I’m okay.”
“Yeah,” she says, smiling as she looks at me. “Yeah, you’re okay.”
I smile. “I can’t believe he yelled at you.” I think this is the first time I’m smiling in a week, and it’s about Grayson. The thought of him yelling at my best friend about my safety makes me want to laugh, but then I think of everything that happened, and that empty feeling returns.
“Yeah,” she says, chuckling. “And by the way, how did he get my number? You know I hate giving people my number,” she asks, raising her brows.
I bite my lip. “I’m sorry, he must have gotten it from my phone,” I say, shrugging.
“It’s fine,” she says with a sigh.
“Why do you hate people having your number, by the way?”
She shrugs. “I just don’t want someone to get a hole of it. People get too clingy. I strictly only do one-night stands,” she says.
I furrow my brows. “Doesn’t that get lonely?” I ask her. I couldn’t imagine sleeping with a new guy every night. It sounds horrible to me. I’m so glad I felt comfortable with Grayson before he finally took my virginity. It was a complete game changer, being able to trust him with my body.
