‘Wow,’ I say.
Tadhg turns around and looks down at me, and then at the poster.
‘You kept it,’ I say.
There it is, in black and white.That first poster.Sourpuss.Shatner.The Band Laura’s In.My name on his wall.
‘Well, yeah,’ he says.
‘I think I’ve got a copy of that poster too,’ I say.‘But not framed.Rolled up in a tube somewhere in my parents’ house.’
We stand on the stairs for a moment looking at the poster and then Tadhg says, ‘Right!Your room.’
The room is large and beautiful, with high ceilings and huge windows.A corner of the room has been sliced off to create a small en suite bathroom.Tadhg stands by the door as I walk in.
‘Whoa,’ I say.‘This is gorgeous.’
‘The pyjamas should be in the drawers over there.And there’ll be a new toothbrush in the bathroom.I’ll set my alarm for nine and we can be in the studio by ten.’
I try and fail to stifle another yawn.‘Thanks for this.And for today.It all … It really helped.’
‘I told you, it’s the very least I could do.’
‘Well, thanks for doing it,’ I say.‘It was a really good day, despite everything.’
‘I had a great day too,’ he said.‘So, you know, thanks for that.’
‘Don’t mention it,’ I say.
For a moment I think he’s going to hug me.For a moment I think I’m going to hug him.But it’s been a long, weird, wonderful day.I’m not going to risk making it awkward at the last minute.
‘Well, goodnight,’ I say.
‘’Night, Lol,’ says Tadhg.He turns to go, his hand on the doorknob.Then he pauses and says, ‘Did I already tell you your ex-fiancé is a dickhead who didn’t know how lucky he was?’
‘Um, yeah, you did,’ I say.
‘Good,’ he says.‘Just checking.’
And he closes the door.
Chapter Thirty-One
2019
I wake up laughing.
I’d been having a lovely dream, a dream that’s now fading from my consciousness, leaving nothing but a vague feeling of happiness and something to do with Tadhg.I float right out of it into happy wakefulness and it takes a moment before I realise where I am.I try to fall back asleep again, but after a while I accept my wakeful state.
I wait for the post-big-night psychic hangover to hit me.I’m expecting all yesterday’s conversations with Tadhg to start replaying in my mind.I’m expecting to cringe at all the stupid, embarrassing or overly revealing things I said.But the hit never comes.Yesterday really was a good day.I mean, seeing Dave wasn’t great, but how we dealt with it was good.Spending all that time with Tadhg was good.I don’t even regret my little rant about not having kids.I feel I can be myself with him.Apart from, of course, the inconvenient unrequited-love aspect.
I left my phone charging overnight after texting Katie to say I wasn’t coming home.Just as I lean out of bed and pick it up, she sends a reply that’s essentially all emojis.
I smile and ring her.
‘You dirty stop-out!’says Katie gleefully.
‘I’m in the spare room!’I say.
