They looked at one another, and Grey was pretty sure the echo of memories in her eyes reflected the same in his. At some point, they lost that connection somehow, and they’d both suffered for it.
The question of the night was whether it was too late for them to find their way back again.
Chapter Sixteen
Cora loved how easy it was to fall back into a rhythm of talking and laughing with Grey. But then there were moments where she felt like they were dancing around a subject without quite hitting on it completely.
Grey was right, though. When they worked together and were always there for each other, they were an impossible team to beat. There was no doubt in Cora’s mind that, when things were good, they were stronger together than she was on her own.
“I know there are a lot of things that went wrong in our marriage,” she began as she picked at one corner of her thumbnail. “I always felt, though, that if I hadn’t insisted you go on that trip things might have gone differently.”
“I shouldn’t have left. You were so detached, Cora, and it killed me to not be able to help you. You didn’t seem to need me. I didn’t want to go on that trip. I wanted to stay with you, talk about the baby, figure things out.” He shrugged. “When I said I’d stay, I was hoping you’d ask me to. You pushed me away again, and I guess that was just all I could take.”
His words caused Cora’s heart to break all over again. Tears came to her eyes, and Grey immediately reached for her hand.
“Please don’t be upset. I’m not telling you this to make you feel bad. I guess I’m trying to be honest about how I felt that night. Something I should’ve done a long time ago.”
She sniffed. “I know.” She got a napkin and dabbed at her eyes. “I know I wasn’t easy to be around. I was hurting and yet determined to act as though everything was fine. Thinking about it was bad enough. I guess I figured talking about it would be even worse.” She swallowed hard. Saying all of this now was incredibly difficult, but he was right. This was all stuff they should’ve said years ago. “When you came to me about that trip, I thought it was your way of escaping. Everything was a nightmare then, so I didn’t blame you. Telling you to go was one of the hardest things I’d ever done.” Cora shrugged, afraid to voice her next thought. “There was a big part of me that wanted you to refuse and stay home with me, but you didn’t.”
Grey blew out a lungful of air and ran the fingers of both hands through his hair. “I had no idea, Cora.”
“I know. You couldn’t.”
“Just like you couldn’t have known I’d wanted you to ask me to stay.” He stared at the clock on the wall as though each tick of the second hand represented the moments that the two of them had let slip through their fingers.
Cora’s stomach hurt, and she abandoned the rest of her ice cream. She folded her arms over her middle and inhaled slowly to clear her mind a little. She’d wanted Grey to stay that night, and so did he. Neither of them had been able to tell the other. That inability to communicate was the biggest factor in their failed marriage.
Grey stood, moved his dining chair next to hers, and then sat down again. He slid an arm around her shoulders and drew her into a one-arm hug. “Good.” He pressed a kiss to the top of her head. “Look, I know that you’re not there yet. But in the interest of being open and honest, you should know that I want to try all of this again. The friendship, relationship, marriage. All of it. Because I think the mistakes we made could’ve been avoided, and we know better now.” He gently tipped her chin up until her gaze met his. “I love you, Cora. Is there any chance you could learn to love me again, too?”
His lips touched hers in a brief kiss that was as sweet and gentle as it was healing. Their contact melted her heart. Cora wished the fear of repeating the past would disappear as easily.
When they parted, she touched his chin with her thumb before dropping her hand. “I’ve always loved you, Grey. I still do.” Her voice shook.
He looked into her eyes, his own shining with a mixture of love, determination, and a hint of disappointment. “But?”
“I don’t want to mess us up again. I’m not sure we can go back to where we were. And honestly, I’m not sure I want to, either. Not after how it ended.” She searched for the right words. “I think we need to go forward as the people we are now and get to know each other that way.”
She prayed he’d understand. Her heart fell to the floor when he stood from the chair and turned away from her.
A moment later, he faced her again with a charming smile on his face. “In that case, Cora Wells, will you go steady with me?” He winked at her.
Cora giggled as relief flooded her system. “I’d like that.” But a moment later, she sobered again. “Promise you’ll tell me the important stuff, even if you’re afraid I’ll be angry or that my feelings will be hurt. I…” her voice clogged with emotion, and she shook her head.
“I’ll promise that, if you’ll do the same for me.” He reached for her hand again and held it tightly in his. “No matter what it is. The way I figure it, if we can sit here and have this conversation after everything that’s happened between us, we can handle anything. Especially if we do it together.”
His words slid over old wounds like salve on a burn that had been festering for far too long. “I promise.”
They talked about some of the things they could do together as they cleaned up after dinner. Cora looked at the clock and was surprised to see it was so late. “I should probably head home, Grey.” She wished she didn’t have to.
He smiled at her. “Thank you again for your help with the stitches. I appreciate it.”
“Not a problem. Thank you for the pizza. I must admit the evenings get a little long sometimes, so it was nice to get out for a while. I had fun, Grey.”
His smile widened. “So did I. If you’re comfortable with it, could you send me your work schedule? The next time we both have the day off, we’ll have to go do something fun for the day.”
“I’d like that.” The thought of having things like this evening to look forward to had Cora feeling lighter than air. She retrieved her jacket and bag.
He went into the kitchen and came back with a pizza box. “You should take this, too. It’ll make a great midnight snack. I’ll walk you out.”
