“C’mon, mom, it’s not like we’re getting married or anything. We’ve got years before we start thinking that seriously about the future,” I argue.
Funny how one tragic event can turn everything on its head.
“I’m just worried you’ll lose yourself in him. I know that might sound weird for me to say, because I did marry your dad pretty soon after graduation, but my dreams were always to build this family. You are more like your dad. I never held him back. Even though we married young, he still followed throughwith his goal of becoming a radiology technician, and a few years later, we bought this house. He didn’t lose himself in me, and I’ve always been the same person. I know who I am and what I want. If you can tell me that what you want is a life with Liam Hale and to build a family with him, then I won’t say another word about it, except to wish you well.”
I shrug, as I did then. “I don’t know Mom. Maybe after I go to school. We’ll see. I think I do want to have a family while I’m still young, but I want to run my own business first.”
“The right person for you will be the one who builds you up. The one who wants to see you reach all of your goals, and who will move heaven and earth to help you do just that. I’ve seen how selfish Liam can be. Not saying anything against him, most young men are selfish at this stage in their development. No matter what he says or does, it reflects on him and his character, not you. Remember that for me, okay?”
“Sure, Mom,” I say.
“That’s my girl.” She turns her back to me and sweeps her honey hair over her shoulder. “Now, zip me up. I think I’ve kept your dad waiting long enough.”
The memory dissolves, and I feel her loss as acutely as I did that night. I cry out and drop to my knees. Years of pain spill free along with a mountain of regret. I pushed that night, and many others out of my head. I thought I did it out of the pain of losing them, but I can see so clearly now that I did it because of shame. I wasn’t strong enough to endure the pain of losing them, so I let Liam drag me along just like my mom feared.
For so long, I’ve been worried that Griffin would see through the façade that I’ve put on to the weak person that Liam saw. First, I thought I’d lose him; I didn’t realize that what I really feared was that I’d already lost myself. The thing I didn’t see is that I’ve been rebuilding myself into the person that I was always meant to be.
My mom was right, the right person does care more about building you up than gaining some relief from tearing you down. Griffin has only ever brought out the best in me. I’m not lost, because he found me and brought me back to myself.
I still can’t figure out why Liam is still able to get to me, but Dolores was right about where to find the answers. I’m at the beginning, and I’ll keep going down this path until I figure out why. I owe Griffin that much because he’s always gone the extra mile for me.
Chapter Eighteen
Griffin - Present
Julio bends downand picks up the wrench I dropped on the ground. “Are you okay? I can finish the tune-up. I know better than asking if you want to talk.”
That drags out a chuckle from me. “I suppose I’ve earned that. I really appreciate how good a job you’ve done managing this shop. This location is important to me, and I couldn’t have left it in the hands of just anyone. Besides Charlie, you’re the only one I trust.”
He gives me an odd look. “You’re freaking me out, boss. Can you go back to grunting your answers, because this talkative version is unsettling.”
I roll my eyes. “Don’t let the power get to your head, kid. It’s still my name on the front of the building.”
“And Charlie’s,” he says.
This does elicit a grunt from me. “You’re starting to sound like him, too. Next thing I know, you’re going to be meddling in my marriage.”
“Do you need me to?” he asks. “Will texted me while you were staring at the engine, all zoned out. He said that he saw Wren in her old neighborhood a little while ago. We’re looking to buy a house, and her childhood home is up for sale, but he told the realtor to give her time, and we’ll go look at it together. Maybe you should go get her?”
I narrow my eyes and wonder if Charlie has already been meddling. Wren was at home when I stormed out. It’s completely conceivable that he’d make his way over to my house to find out what's going on.
“Are you sure it was Wren? Maybe he just saw someone who looked like her,” I suggest.
I know it sounds like a ridiculous idea, but only if you’ve never seen the Parker women together. Wren is the spitting image of her mother. Hattie is nearly ten years older, but she looks like she could be Wren’s twin sister.
“I know Will hasn’t been around as much since he’s gone back to school, but he’s not so out of touch that he can’t recognize Wren,” Julio replies.
“Sorry, I wasn’t implying anything. You know we all like Will, and we’ll be right there in the family section cheering him on when he graduates this summer. I was hoping that it might have been Hattie for some reason. I know there is a clinic that she still volunteers at occasionally.”
Usually, I’m pretty terse, even with friends, but I find myself needing to get some of this off my chest. “We had a fight this morning, and I took off,” I admit. “If she really is back inside her childhood home, then our fight was worse than I thought.”
Julio’s face looks serious, and that tells me that he agrees with me. “My abuela used to say that words are weapons ortools. They can be wielded to destroy or heal people, it just depends on how you choose to use them.”
I look at the mess I made around me rather than actually doing the tune-up. “Well, I guess I have a chance to fix something today. I’m not doing such a great job here.”
As soon as I close myself in the cab of my truck, I try calling Wren, but after ringing a few times, it goes to voicemail. That’s not like her, which worries me. She’s never unavailable, especially when she’s away from our kids. I keep trying her all the way across town, without any luck.
I pull up behind a bright blue SUV that’s parked in front of the house. I go around to the driver’s side window and tap until it’s rolled down. “I should have known it would be you. Is Wren in the house?”
