I know he doesn’t mean that to be a slight because Jake’s genuinely a good guy, but being reminded of my manwhore past is starting to get under my skin. Like it’s a role I used to play that I’m not comfortable with anymore.
It makes me wonder if Roxy has reservations about my past too.
My father says I’m a bad bet. Maybe he’s right. Maybe Rox shouldn’t count on me.
I finish drying off and throw on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt.
“Wanna grab a bite to eat?” Jake asks from his locker across from me.
“I can’t. I’m taking Roxy to her doctor appointment. I’m kinda excited. I like seeing the bean on that monitor. The way the exam room fills with that little heartbeat is crazy. There’s a whole life in there. It’s wild.”
He side-eyes me for a sec and lowers his voice. “You’re much better at this dad thing than I thought you’d be.”
I laugh and tug on my socks. “We’ll see how long it lasts.” It’s probably easier to be chill when it’s not your kid hurtling toward you like a bowling ball about to bash into those pins. “Probably until the first time the kid shits on me. That happens, right?”
Jake laughs and smacks me on the back. “All the time when they’re little.”
My stomach turns a little. “Great. Looking forward to that.” Almost as much as I want to nick my balls with a razor.
25
ROXY
“I’mglad to hear you haven’t had any more spotting.” Dr. Irving smiles as she reviews my chart. “How does it feel to be officially sixteen weeks along?”
Scary as hell. “Exhilarating. And terrifying.”
Billy squeezes my hand, and the tension in my shoulders wanes a bit. I’m grateful to have him standing by my side as I sit on the exam table.
“That’s completely normal. I can assure you most soon-to-be mothers have felt the exact same way at some point during their pregnancies.” She turns to Billy. “Daddy, how are you feeling?”
“Um.” He blinks several times. “What?”
Billy might’ve come to the first appointment with me, but the tech only called him in at the end when we did the ultrasound. This is the first time he’s talking to my doctor, and she obviously assumes he’s the father.
She motions to my belly. “This is going to be a big change for both of you. How are you feeling? Have you been reading all of the daddy books to prepare?”
“Daddy books?” He looks like a deer caught in the headlights of an eighteen-wheeler. It’s my turn to squeeze his hand. It’s notas though this is actually his child. Though, now that I’m getting to know him better, I wish it was. It would be so much easier to do this with him than my idiot ex.
The doctor rattles off a list of titles she recommends for first-time fathers. As she sits on the chair in front of me, she pauses. “You should probably readWhat to Expect When You’re Expectingtoo. Although it’s written for the mother, you’ll get so much insight into the changes Roxy’s body is going through. So if she’s cranky or tired or really turned on, you’ll understand more about what’s happening to her body.”
“Really turned on?” he asks, his voice husky.
I chuckle. That got his attention.
She nods. “A high libido during second trimester is one of the best parts of pregnancy, which might not make up for all the nausea Roxy experienced first trimester, but it’s better than losing your breakfast every day.”
Maybe this is a good time to ask… “Doc, speaking of libido, is it safe to have sex again?”
She flips through my chart and clicks her pen before she turns to me. “After today’s exam, assuming everything looks good, you’re free to go back to your usual routine, and yes, that includes sex. As long as there’s no more cramping or spotting. Take it easy whenever you need to. I don’t usually do a pelvic exam at sixteen weeks, but since you were spotting, I want to err on the side of caution.”
“Can I start working out again? I mean, if I have the energy. Lately I’ve been crashing as soon as I get home.”
“As long as you start slow and don’t do anything too strenuous, you can do light workouts. You might consider yoga poses to help with the round ligament pain we discussed, like the pelvic tilt and cat-cow. If you’re able to stay in shape during pregnancy, that might help you recover more quickly. However, if something is uncomfortable, be it during sex or any other dailyactivity, stop and assess how you’re feeling. Continue taking prenatal vitamins and stay extra hydrated. Your baby needs those fluids for his or her placenta. And needing more sleep is normal.”
“That’s a relief.” I laugh.
“She does sleep a lot,” Billy says. “Kinda had me worried. She’s usually a night owl.”
