I try not to think of the details because, right now, it’s just perfect.
Charlie
As I walk Grace back to our cars, I can’t help thinking that I don’t remember the last time I took a day off.
There’s a reason I work my ass off.
I go after what I want, and what I want right now, more than wanting the bar to be stable, isher.
I lean close to her ear, letting my warm breath tickle her neck and sending goosebumps over every inch of her body as I ask, “You have a good time tonight?” The sun’s setting, the crickets are out, and everything about this moment is picture perfect.
“You know I did.” Her shoulders shake with a soft laugh and she pushes me away slightly, a bit of space coming between us as we walk through the grass of the park. I’m quick to close the gap, grabbing her hand and giving it a squeeze before pulling her back to me.
“Does this count as a first date?” my voice carries through the dark night.
“A date? All you asked was if I wanted funnel cake,” she answers with a wide grin as she looks straight ahead.
“Well who doesn’t love funnel cake?” I respond without thinking.
Grace rips her hand from mine, covering her face with a laugh before shaking her head. I love that sound. She practically skips a few steps to get back to me, that beautiful smile still etched on her face. My chest feels warm and full.
But I know this is temporary unless I do and say the right things. Committing to things in life that I am not ready for. It feels like a date, but a girl like her needs more than a hot dog, cola and fried donuts.
The night's still young.
The clouds seem to dim a bit more as the noises from the people leaving the festival behind us fade. We’re some of the last people to leave.
Grace clears her throat in a polite fashion as we pass the last tent. The sky’s darkening and dry lightning is in the far-off distance, brightening the horizon before leaving us in darkness with a loud crash. It’s comforting though, and each time it happens, Grace steps a little closer to me. Her small body practically molded to mine as we leave the festival and head to the parking lot.
I love the warmth of her body, the feminine sounds of her gasps every time the lightning cracks across the sky. It doesn’t take any effort at all to wrap my arm around her waist and pull her closer.
It’s a real date, whether she wants to admit it or not.
I don’t miss the way she perks up and deliberately avoids looking at me the second my skin touches hers.
“Did you have fun?” she asks me shyly. I like this side of Grace. At the bar she lets herself go sometimes, but mostly she’s just joking to hide the real her.
She has a shit day, it’s just a joke.
She’s in a fight, she laughs it off.
But that insecurity is always there just beneath the surface. Out here in the open without the dim lights of the bar and alcohol, I’m not letting her get away with hiding anything. I want to know the real her. And I’m not holding back in the least.
It’s different, and I like it. I want more of it. I want more of her.
“I did,” I smile down at her as we walk through the path and finally reach the skinny sidewalk that leads us home.
The parking lot is at the very front and there’s relative privacy from a row of trees that lines the sidewalk. It’s late and dark. The sound of a car starting up leads my eyes to look straight ahead and watch the passengers drive off. Other than that, we're leaving the world behind us as we head home.
My jaw ticks and I tighten my grip around her waist as I realize we drove separately. Dammit. My fingers tighten a bit on her. I don’t want this to end. I don’t want to leave here and never get this side of her back.
I just need another date. The wedding.
The anxiety squeezing my heart fades as I realize I still have her. I still have a chance to give her what she needs to stay with me.
I can hold her for a little longer, get to see more of this side of her. She’s looking for Mr. Right, but I can keep her occupied until he comes along.
Crack!
