“Some chick?” I lift one eyebrow. “You must not remember her if you think she’s just some chick.”
“I do remember her. I know how she looks.” Jared shows his disgust in the scrunch of his brows. “You sound whipped. I assumed it was just pussy.”
“Watch your mouth, Jared,” I snap and point a warning finger at him.
“I didn’t mean any disrespect, but damn. She lives with Caleb. They have a kid together. It’s really inconvenient if you have athingfor her, Gus.”
“We’re friends.” I rebuke him with a glare. “And don’t call me Gus.”
Jared knows I hate the childhood nickname and uses it to get on my nerves. I have enough on my nerves without adding him.
“So this dirty play was about Iris?” Jared asks. “I saw her at the game with her daughter.”
“Yeah, I saw her, too.”
“Doing rehab here in Maryland—that isn’t about her, is it?” Jared shakes his head, not waiting for my answer. “And now you’re conveniently volunteering with her.”
I tip my head back into the soft leather of the headrest, answering with only a sigh.
Jared bangs a fist into the steering wheel. “Dammit, August. What part of ‘keep the hell away from my girl’ do you not understand? What’s Caleb gonna have to break next for you to get the message?”
I snap narrowed eyes over to him. “I’d like to see that motherfucker try to break something else.” I adjust my seat, leaning back, worn out from the few hours at the community center. “There’s more going on than meets the eye. She’s wearing his ring, but she tells me they’re not engaged.”
“Maybe she’s playing you both. The only thing better than having one rich man strung out on you is having two.”
“Shut the hell up. If you’ve met Iris, you know she’s not like that.”
“She seemed like a nice girl. Driven. Bright. Sharp. I wanted her on my team,” Jared admits. “That doesn’t mean she’s not trouble.”
“Well if she’s trouble, it’s trouble I want to get into,” I tell him, defiance in the look I level at him from the passenger seat. “She made sure I knew she wasn’t engaged for a reason. She doesn’t want me to give up.”
“But you should.”
“But I won’t.” I shake my head. “You don’t get it.”
“What Igetis that because of your preoccupation with Caleb’s baby mama, your leg is broken, your career is up in the air, your team may trade your ass, and everything you’ve worked for your whole life is in jeopardy. For some pussy.”
“It’s not like that. She—”
“Oh, so you don’t want to fuck her?”
Of course, I want to fuck her. What am I? A eunuch?
“Notjustthat.” I try to stop it, but my lips twitch at the corners.
“It’s not funny,” Jared says, but when I look over at him, his lips are twitching, too. We both give in and chuckle.
It gets quiet while we zip through the familiar streets. So many Saturdays through the years he brought me to the community center in his beat-up Camry. We talked about my far-fetched dream of playing in the NBA. Of him managing the biggest names in sports. Of how we’d sit on top of the world together.
Now, we’re in his Porsche. I’m a baller, a brand with one of the highest-selling jerseys in the league. One of the fattest contracts a rookie’s ever gotten. And I’d risk it all for a girl? I know what he means, but I want more than basketball. I want a life beyond that. I’m not saying that life is with Iris, but Iamsaying I’ve never felt with anyone else what I feel with her, and I have to chase that as hard as I chased basketball. What I felt today, what I’ve felt every time I’ve been with her, it’s real and it’s special. It’s worth chasing. If I don’t try, I’ll always wonder.
What if the thing that seems like an impossible dream is within my grasp?
Iris
Ishouldn’t have toldhim I wasn’t engaged.
It’s selfish and reckless to encourage August. At least until I get out from under Caleb. At some point, I know I’ll have to ask someone for help, but it will be at the right time when I have the tools not only to escape from Caleb, but tokeephim out of our lives. Until I have that, I should be so careful about every step I take, and indulging myself, my yearning for what I see in August’s eyes and feel in his touch . . . It’s anything but careful. If Caleb is capable of half the things I think he is, recklessness could get August hurt even more than he already has been.
