CHAPTER 1
Toni
“Nicer than Ithought it would be,” Ben says as he pushes my last three boxes of records off the dolly.
“What were you expecting?” I plop down on the still plastic-wrapped sofa.
My new landlords were nice enough to let the delivery folks in this morning. Sure, they only had to come downstairs and unlock the door, but I would’ve been screwed if they hadn’t because my brother and I were still several hours outside of Boston.
He looks around, his eyes scanning over the cast-iron radiators and original pocket doors—all the little details that stuck out to me when Sophie showed me the pictures her cousin sent over.
“It's dated,” she warned me, as if the building's hundred year-old charm would be a deal breaker. If anything, the details and imperfections made it appeal to me more. It was everything the millennial gray condo I shared with David for the last three years wasn't—interesting, inviting, inspiring, even.
A few months and a few thousand miles separated from David, and I could now see the similarities between that condoand our relationship, or maybe just the condo and David himself. They were practical, good investments, at least moderately reliable, and neither felt like home.
“Something more... college-y?” He grabs a couple bottles of water from the bag of gas station spoils from our two thousand-mile journey, tossing one at me. “Isn't your friend's cousin in school?”
“I wouldn't say she's a friend.” I owed Sophie one for this hookup, but we'd been coworkers—or whatever you called a person you saw a few times a week at a co-working space. “But her cousin's in a PhD program. At MIT. Not exactly the ragers-on-the-weekend crowd.”
He nods, making a circuit of the cozy one-bedroom.
I take a long drink, pulling my shirt away from my skin. While June in Massachusetts was blissfully cool compared to Houston's already ninety-plus and humid temperatures, I still broke a sweat lugging in the scattered pieces of my life.
“Sure you'll be ok without AC?”
I shrug. “I'll just get a couple of window units.”
“Not the first time, I guess.”
None of my childhood homes had something as wonderful as central AC, or if they did, the units gave up the ghost long before I came along.
Ben sighs, sitting on the stack of flat-packed furniture pieces across from me. It was a sigh I'd heard several times over the last couple of days.
“Don't.”
“I didn't say anything.” He holds his free hand up.
“But you were going to.”
Silence lingers for a few fleeting moments before he loses his fight for self-control. “It's just so far, Toni.”
“That's the point.” If there had been a sublease in Antarctica, I would have taken it. The farther from David, the better.
“And if something goes wrong?”
Why would that matter? Things had gone wrong in other places I'd landed over the years. In Austin there was a break-in, I gained a stalker in Atlanta, and my car flooded in New Orleans. All shitty situations and I hadn't needed him for any of them. I wouldn't have needed him for the Houston disaster had most of my so-called friends not taken David’s side.
Only you’d be mad at someone wanting to marry you, Toni.Their admonishments still sting months later.
Even without them, I could have made the move on my own. Sure, it would have taken more money and logistical effort on my end, but had Ben not been able to help, I would have figured it out. I've been figuring things out alone since I was seventeen.
“I'll handle it,” I say with a bit more bite than intended. It wasn't his fault. None of it was. He didn't owe his younger half-sister his time or his worry, and I should be grateful he offered up what he did. I force myself to give at least a half-hearted smile to smooth over any rough edges. “It's what I'm good at.”
“Right.” He nods. For a moment, it feels like he might say more, maybe crack open one of the many pieces of baggage between us. But no, in true Southern fashion, he pivots the conversation to food. “Let's figure out a place to eat and get the truck back. My flight’s too early tomorrow to bother with that, and I don't want you to have to mess with it.”
Given that we sit surrounded by my literal baggage, I'm honestly grateful. He and I could tackle all that after I deal with my current mess. “Sounds good.”
After more than a month,my current mess has, in fact, not been tackled.
