TOBIAS BARRETT
Icheck the clock. It’s ten-thirty. Why isn’t Kiki home yet? I’m sitting in the family room and everyone else has gone to bed except Noah, who’s at work. I feel fidgety and nervous for some reason, which doesn’t make any sense. Maybe Levi’s words have gotten to me. I keep playing Kiki’s interactions with Noah in my mind, and I don’t like it. Does Noah really like her that way?
The thought of Noah and Kiki on a date makes me queasy. I imagine them holding hands, getting cuddly, and my fists clench. If I’m being honest with myself, I don’t want Noah anywhere near Kiki because I want to be the one near her. I sigh and shove a hand through my hair. Levi’s right. I like her, but it’s more than that. We have a connection. I just keep feeling like it’s wrong to explore it. Is Levi correct in thinking I’m trying to shield myself from pain because of Courtney?
The front door opens, and I suddenly don’t know what I’m supposed to do. Do I stand? Turn on the TV? It looks stupid, mesitting in the family room, waiting for her to walk in, so I grab a book and open it to the middle. I stare at the page as I listen to her footsteps, holding the book up so she’ll think I’m reading. She enters the room. “I’m home.”
I stare at my book like I’m finishing the page before I look up and nod at her. “Thanks for letting me know.”
She scrunches her nose. “Why are you reading a crossword puzzle dictionary?”
I close the book slowly, cursing Noah and his love for crossword puzzles. “I was looking something up.” I toss it back onto the end table.
“Ah. Okay.” She turns to leave, and I panic. I want more time with her. I want to talk with her and touch her again. I want her to tell me more about her life.
“Would you like me to make you some tea?” I blurt.
She shakes her head. “I’ve had enough tea, thanks.”
I stand, not knowing what else there is to say to make her stay with me. She doesn’t leave, though, and that gives me some courage. “Want to sit on the porch?”
“Actually, I was going to sneak out back and walk along the beach. It’s so pretty at night.”
“Oh.” I look down at the hardwood floors.
She fiddles with her fingers. “Want to come?”
It’s been a long time since I walked along the beach, mostly because that was something Courtney and I would do, and it feels tainted. But maybe it’s time to make new memories there. “Only if I’m not imposing.”
“You’re not,” she says quickly. “I’d like the company.”
“All right.” I look down at my jeans and white button-up shirt. “Mind if I change first?”
She smiles at me, and I see a hidden glee behind it. “Go ahead.”
I go upstairs to my room and change into a black t-shirt and shorts, knowing Kiki’s going to flip. Contrary to what she thinks, I do own casual clothes. I find her in the kitchen, waiting for me.
“Wow, Tobias,” she says as she pushes off the counter. “You’re looking more and more like a real person.”
I walk over to her. “I’m not a real person?” The thought occurs to me that I could show her I’m not made of cotton. I’m made of flesh and blood, like she is. My gaze dips to her lips. It might be fun to show her that. But I take a step back and shove that thought out of my head. Stupid Levi giving me ideas.
She laughs. “You’re getting there. Love the shirt.”
I look down and realize I’m wearing a shirt Micah got for me last Christmas. It says, “I used to be a people person…but people ruined that for me.”
She walks out the back door, and I fall into step beside her. We’re barefoot, and I’ve forgotten how good it feels to let the sand sift between my toes. It’s still warm out, but the sand is cool and the breeze off the water feels nice. She heads straight for the water. I walk beside her on the wet sand.
“Did you have a good time at Ellie’s?”
“Yes. We talked about all kinds of great ideas for the gallery.” As she tells me about their conversations, she gets animated, and I know she’s excited to try to pump life into the gallery.
“Pairing up with the vineyard is a great idea,” I say. “I think the gallery clientele will love a wine tasting.” A wave comes and washes over my feet. It’s cool, but not unpleasant.
“Ellie sent an email off to that artist she knows, so hopefully that will work out.” Kiki clasps her hands together in front of her. “I’m excited about the classes. I’ve always wanted to play with paints.”
“You’re quite talented. I think you’d be a great artist.”
She looks up at me. “What do you mean? When have you seen my art?”
