He turned on his heel, his eyes focused on mine. “Are you sure?” He took small, slow steps toward me. “If they’re so harmless, why’d you look so nervous when I was walking past you?”
A brief memory flew by of when he approached me in almost the exact spot he stood now, wearing his dark jeans and gray hooded sweatshirt.
Only this time, he was wearing a suit that made him look incredibly sexy. And this time, I wasn’t stepping back; I was resisting the urge to go toward him.
Then I realized I didn’t need to. He was now standing directly in front of me.
“What are you doing here?” he breathed.
I wasn’t sure if he meant where I was standing at that very moment or why I had stayed in Madison. “I needed to be alone.” I turned away. I glanced around him and didn’t see Haley anywhere. I resisted the urge to ask.
“Do you still want to be alone?” he asked, taking another step closer to me, as if it was possible.
I couldn’t answer. There was a ball forming in my throat with every step he took closer to me. I swallowed it away and stared back at him, waiting for my heart to stop beating before I spoke.
After glaring at me for another moment, he glanced down and stepped back. “I took Haley home a little early.”
“Was she not having a good time?” I asked, relieved for the breathing room.
“I think she could tell it wasn’t her I wanted to be there with.” He waited for me to respond, but I just waited back, not trusting my voice. “I went back to the Admiral after dropping her off and looked for you. Rachel told me you’d left but that she didn’t think you were headed back to the apartment.” He glanced around. “Last time you needed to take a walk, this was where you went, wasn’t it?”
I nodded.
He took a step closer. “You didn’t leave.”
“I don’t think I was ever going to.”
He looked down at his feet. “I should have known that. I’m sorry I got so angry and stormed off the way I did. You needed me, whether it was my support, or advice, and all I could do was get angry because Chris had been more what you needed, and I was the flake that was only holding you back.”
I shook my head. “No, you weren’t holding me back. Rick, you’ve been the only one who believed in me when everyone else thought I was too impulsive and out of my mind,” I started. “It was one thing hearing it from Em and Chris…” I felt the lump in my throat again. “But then my dad, the one person whose opinion matters, the last real family I have left, came here to shake me back to my senses. So…I broke.”
Rick looked me up and down. “Obviously not.”
“No.” I admitted. My breakdown didn’t last long and I did eventually find my way, but it had cost me my relationship with him.
“I heard about the art school in New York.” He raised an impressed eyebrow.
I nodded. “I was accepted.” I smiled. “My dad sent them some of my work, and they offered me a partial scholarship with a work-study program on campus. I move in the end of August.”
Rick beamed. “That’s incredible, Amy.”
The incredible part for me was that I finally had my dad’s support in something I had a real passion for.
“If I come near you again, do you think you could keep yourself from falling?”
I blushed. I knew what he meant. I was fully aware of my proximity to the edge of the pool and knew I was safe. “I can’t make any promises.”
“In that case…” Rick took a single quick step toward me and pulled me by the waist away from the edge. It was so quick, I almost lost my balance, but he held me securely with both hands, catching my lips with his. We kissed for a moment until I lightly pulled away.
“Do you always kiss girls you’re irritated by?”
He looked confused for a moment until I looked toward the beach. He breathed and nodded once. “If you’re talking about the one time at the beach after you left, yes. I kissed her, but only to show her that there’s nothing there and never was. And maybe, to convince myself of something I already knew.”
“What do you already know?”
“That you’re the only one I ever want to kiss.”
My heart sank again at his words but not in the heartbreaking way that it had before. It bounced off my stomach and plopped back into place, leaving me feeling whole and happy again. Being there with him felt so right and so strong. It was hard to feel any doubt. And that was something I had unfortunately gotten very used to feeling.
