“Yes, they have five children between the two of them. All of them boys. They are awfully clever, my nephews, and good at school.”
“I thought there was no school in the village?” Lizzie said.
“There isn’t. I pay their fees at a boarding school that the Duke helped enrol them in,” Stevenson said with unmistakable pride.
Elizabeth was moved to tears by his generosity and care for his family.
“You sound like a wonderful uncle, I imagine they love you very much,” she said softly, and Stevenson pretended to look at the hem of her pelisse until he was composed enough to reply with a simple thanks.
They worked in companionable silence after that, but Elizabeth’s mind wouldn't stop buzzing. She tried forcing herself to focus on hems or buttons or the feel of material in hand, but there were simply too many knots to untie: Elinor, America, Colin…
She called on Elinor again the next day and was pleasantly surprised by her improved countenance. Elizabeth wisely decided to keep the conversation away from Elinor’s problems, and instead told her about her new nephew, her improvedrelationship with Nicholas, the state of Charlotte’s marriage, and how she had finally forgiven Colin.
“I cannot believe it,” Elinor said after they’d been conversing for a while. “We shall be living in America, like we both dreamed of.”
Elizabeth didn’t want to spoil her friend’s newfound joy, but the thought of moving to America no longer evoked a feeling of lightness inside her.
“It still feels unreal,” she said non-committally.
“I admit I shall miss everyone,” Elinor sighed. “How long does it take for a letter to reach America? I must know the latest gossip!”
Lizzie laughed. “I’m certain there is more than enough gossip in America.”
“I’m too invested in your sister’s story to care about anything else,” Elinor said, then hesitated briefly. “Is she right?”
“Who? Charlotte?” Lizzie asked with a frown, and Elinor nodded shyly.
Understanding dawned on Elizabeth’s face.
“Ah. How do I say this delicately?” She said and looked up at the ceiling. “I can only speak for myself, but as always, one should consider that all people are different. For me, marriage and its accompaniments have been… wonderful. And let’s leave it at that for now,” she said awkwardly.
Elinor looked relieved. “What do you think makes it different for other women?”
“Honestly, I have no idea. Is it the man? Is it the woman? Is it how they feel about each other? Who can say? But that extends to almost everything in life, not just… the marital bed, as my aunt Isolde says. Look at Colin’s mother and how her life wasruined by her forced marriage. Meanwhile, one could say the same thing happened to me, but with quite different results.”
“But you and Duke Talbot are different,” Elinor interjected.
“That’s what I’m saying, everything is different for everyone.”
“Hm,” Elinor hummed thoughtfully. “How’s Mary?”
“She’s about ready to give up,” Lizzie laughed. “Her mother says it’s most likely going to take another month until she is brought to bed, but all Mary writes about is how she is ready any day now. Working on establishing the Foundling wing at the estate keeps her mind occupied, though.”
“That is such a noble thing you and the Duke are doing,” Elinor said. “How will you manage to leave it all?”
Lizzie looked away, but Elinor took her hand.
“Elizabeth, if you don’t think your lack of enthusiasm is apparent to me, one of your closest friends, then you’re even less perceptive than I am,” she said with an encouraging smile, and Lizzie exhaled.
“It still isn’t clear to me how I feel about all this. On one hand, yes, I detest theTonand I would love a fresh start far away from it, but lately… I’m not even concerned with it. I go to the events that I feel like going to, I spend time with the people I care about, and our charitable work has been fulfilling in a way that I never thought possible, for both Colin and I. Leaving so many in the muck only to make a new life for myself feels… selfish.”
“I’m certain there are many poor people in need of your help in America,” Elinor said lightly.
“I know,” Lizzie said a bit dejectedly.
“Don’t go only because of me!” Elinor exclaimed. “I can think of something, I will…”
“Elinor, listen to me,” Elizabeth said in a determined voice. “Whether I stay or go, you are going, and you are not marrying that man, that I promise you, all right? I just need to talk to Colin to find a solution that works for everyone.”
